TheRunDown.net

So, you want to run 100 miles!

Having recently entered our first 100-Mile ultra (San Diego 100), we asked a few respected veteran runners for any advice that would increase our odds of avoiding the dreaded DNF. We were expecting some “good luck” and “have fun” ata boys but not with this crowd. The responses were so real we’re considering a 24-hour dart tournament instead. But, since many of our readers may be considering their first 100-Miler or maybe trying to improve upon their last one, we’re sharing the honest advice from some very straight forward people.

Bill Ramsey

Since 1995, over the course of having run twenty-three 100 milers, including eleven sub-24s, I’ve developed a personal approach to preparing for and running 100-Milers. Along the way, I’ve been blessed to have run a best of 18:34:15 at the 1997 Rocky Raccoon 100, finish ten consecutive Angeles Crest 100s, and complete my first four attempts at the Western States 100 in under 24 hours. In June 2007, I arrived at Squaw Valley with more intensive training than any of my prior four WSER runs. I was over trained and ran 26:23 after arriving at Foresthill just under 24 hour pace, but walking most of the final 30 miles.

I’ve found that preparation and strategy are key elements to running successful 100 milers. Success at 100 miles doesn’t just happen, it’s the result of good planning. Before going further, I want to acknowledge Earl Towner, a great ultrarunner with top 10 finishes at both Western States and Leadville for his advice, wisdom, and encouragement. It has been invaluable in helping me to get the most out of my ability. Following the tips outlined below, I’ve continued to get good results and have satisfying race experiences. In July 2006, I covered 100 miles in 20:54 and 110 miles in 24 hours during the 24-hour Relay for Life in hot, humid conditions, and raised almost $8,000 for the American Cancer Society. At 54 years old and with over 25 years of running and racing, training is an important part of the equation. However, pacing, nutrition, hydration, electrolytes, foot care, and other factors are all critical to success at the 100 mile distance. I hope these tips will help you develop a successful race strategy and finish your 100 miler with a smile on your face and the deep sense of satisfaction that only a 100 mile finish can give you

Training: Generally, it’s necessary to get your weekly running mileage up to a minimum of 65-75 miles about five or six weeks before the 100 and hold that mileage for three weekends, and then take a three week taper. In terms of long runs, 50 milers can be good but can take a lot out of you if you don't run them very easy and provide adequate recovery in between 50s. I'll typically do three 50 milers in three months in preparation for WS100. It’s not necessary to run more than 30 miles on any given day within eight weeks of WS100. If your body and legs can handle the training load, then pushing your weekly mileage up to 80-90 miles will pay big dividends. But don’t risk injury or over-training for high mileage. Some folks run the Miwok 100k in early May as a “tune-up” for WSER. I think it’s too many miles to close to the race.

A three week taper (90 to 60 to 30 miles, or 75 to 50 to 25) generally seems ideal. You can adjust the taper based on your own total mileage I’ve had excellent success with my longest training runs being 22-28 miles, and typically rest on Monday with an occasional rest day on Friday. The Monday/Friday rest has always worked well to rest up for and recover from especially long mileage over the weekend. Occasionally, you can throw in an easy Friday before the big weekend. On the 5th weekend before a 100 miler, I like to do 16-20 on Friday, 24-30 on Saturday, and 18-20 on Sunday for 58-70 miles in 3 days to simulate race conditions. The Sunday run is done on relatively dead legs and teaches your body and head how to make those legs turnover just when you thought they had nothing left in them. During training runs, I often visualize myself running the upcoming race. Visualization can be a great confidence builder.

Pace: I always run the first half of a 100 miler with a "training" frame-of-mind. I don’t worry about where I am at place-wise and who’s in front of me or passing me. At WSER, it’s been common for me to have 28 and 29 hour folks in front of me early in the race. You want to run with purpose and keep moving, and not hang out at aid stations any longer than you have to. Try not to spend more than 1-2 minutes in any aid station except those where you may be doing a sock/shoe change or taking care of other business. If you’re merely filling water bottles, make sure they’re empty as you approach the aid station with the caps off. I typically pull my gel and salt out of my waist pack as I approach. Be careful who handles your bottles and don’t hesitate to tell them to take their time. You don’t need to make a NASCAR pit-stop. You want them to be careful. The “training pace” mindset will keep you from over-extending yourself. You want to get to the mid-point of the race feeling pretty fresh. At the 50 or 55 mile aid station, you want to put on your race-face and begin to push the pace. You’ll be amazed at how many folks pushed too hard too early and are struggling. You’ll likely begin passing folks which will naturally build your confidence. I always have three goals for any race. At WSER, those goals are sub-24, sub-26, and sub-30. If you find your first goal slipping out of hand, you’ll have to establish a new goal to keep you motivated and moving.

Nutrition: Stay with liquids (gels and/or drink powders) during the day, and only some light solids at night (chicken soup), unless you know your system can easily handle solid food. You’re body can only do one thing well at a time. If you put solid food in your stomach, it will divert more blood away from other major organs and muscles to help digestion. Do not introduce anything new on race day! If you haven't consumed it during training, don't consume it on race day. There are folks who have been in great shape to go sub-24 and dropped at WS100 from serious stomach distress from violating this rule. At the major aid stations (Duncan, Michigan Bluff, and Rucky Chucky), while I’m changing socks and re-lubing my feet, I’ll drink a can of Ensure or Boost in a bottle poured over ice. They’re a good, digestible source of calories.
I use E-gel (Crank Sports) and although it's designed to be eaten like all gels, I put it in my water bottles and mix it with water. This cuts the sweetness and makes it much more palatable, which means I'll drink it continuously without reservation. At night, I’ll pour warm Mountain Dew over ice in my bottles. The ice melts and results in cold 50-50% blend of Dew and water which is more digestible than straight Dew. The combination of sugar and caffeine is outstanding. Remember to try this during your training runs to see how well your stomach will handle the fructose and caffeine.

Hydration: Staying well hydrated is critical at 100 miles. Set your repeat timer function on your watch so that it "beeps" every 10 minutes and drink when it beeps, a little if it’s cool (2-4 oz.) and a lot if its hot (6-10 oz.). No one is capable of remembering to drink on a regular basis during a 100. The watch will provide a continuous reminder. If you're losing weight, you're dehydrating, and if you're gaining weight, you’re probably taking too much electrolyte and retaining fluids. If your fingers are feeling puffy and its difficult to close your fist without felling tightness in your hand, you’ve got to much electrolyte in you and you need to cut back.

Electrolytes: There are all kinds of slick pills out there (tablets and caplets), but I don't use them because it’s difficult to determine when and how much to take. It’s too easy to consume too little or much. Because E-gel has electrolyte, I don't worry about having to take supplemental electrolyte unless it's very warm (over 80 F). Then I supplement with a little table salt that I always carry in a 35mm plastic film can. About a ¼ teaspoon in every 2nd or 3rd 24 oz. water bottle with E-gel when air temps are over 80 degrees and you’re sweating profusely works great. If your using plain gel (Hammer, GU, etc.), add the ¼ tsp of salt to each 24 oz. Water bottle. More importantly, by putting the salt in your water bottle, you’re continuously "metering-in" fluids, electrolytes, and calories, just what your body needs.

Foot Care: Not taking care of your feet will bounce you out of a 100 faster than you can say “DNF!” After having my feet fall apart in my first 100, I've tried everything and have settled on sock changes every 25 miles or so which equates to 3 sock changes in a 100. It will take you about 10 to 12 minutes to change socks but it will be well worth it. I prefer thin Coolmax socks to remove the moisture from my feet to the shoe as quickly as possible. Heavy socks are cushiony and feel good, but will also hold more moisture against your skin raising the potential for blisters. Everybody blisters at different spots. Know where your hotspots are and take care of them. Let your crew or aid station folks fill your water bottles while you change. Remember, give them precise instructions on what you want in those bottles. I use Desitin diaper ointment (40% zinc oxide) and cover my toes and the ball of my foot which tend to be my problem areas. If your heels get hot, put it there to. If your experiencing chafing on the inside of your thighs or between your butt cheeks, put Desitin there too. Hell, that’s what it was originally designed for and this is not the time to be modest. If you have an emerging chafing problem, you have to take care of it. In a 100, especially if it’s humid, you will chafe and it will become a problem if not addressed. At Massanutten in 2000, the temps and humidity were both well into the 90s. Of 128 runners, only 61 finished. The chafing between my thighs and around my waist from my water bottle pack was awful. I have a buddy who had to drop at 74 miles at the AC100 in 1999 because his butt chafed so bad it was blistered (i.e. monkey-butt). Gaiters will keep a lot of dirt and crap out of your shoes and help immensely in blister avoidance (www.dirtygirlgaiters.com).

Splits: Don’t get stressed if you’ve developed goal time splits, and you’re not hitting them.  It’s OK, the race won’t start until past 50 miles. Remember, it’s easy to lose a lot of time in aid stations, so get in and get out. “Beware the chair.” I refuse to sit in a chair at an aid station unless I’m tending my feet/changing socks. You want to stay in an aid station only as long as it takes to do what you have to do, no longer. At WSER, I’ll change socks and re-lube my feet at Duncan Canyon (24m), Michigan Bluff (55m), and the far side of Rucky Chucky (78m) which takes 10 to 12 minutes. Otherwise, I spend no more than 1-2 minutes in an aid station.

Nighttime: You’ll move more slowly at night than during the day. Don’t worry, be happy. However, if you’ve run the first 50 miles or so like a long training run, you’ll find yourself passing other runners. It will be a huge lift psychologically. Remember to continue to eat and drink. A headlamp and handheld LED flashlight work great, the headlamp for distance, and the handheld for close in. Let the arm holding your flashlight hang a little more loosely at your side and use your wrist to control the light’s trajectory. Try not to keep your bicep flexed continuously or it will ache the entire next day. I carry 8-10 Vivarin or No-Doz (200 mg caffeine) tablets and if I find myself losing my mental focus, I take a caffeine pill. Because I drink Mountain Dew over ice at night, I typically don’t need caffeine pills. However, aid stations don’t always have Dew available.

Weather/Clothing: Be prepared for all possible conditions. Unexpected storms have been known to roll in on race day at many events. Getting cold and wet will make life miserable. But if you have the right gear, you'll be comfortable and able to focus on running instead of trying your best not to be miserable. Typically, WSER has hot weather during the day, and warm or seasonal temps at night. Rarely will you need a light jacket. But every 10 or 15 years, you can experience a cool, wet race. You’ll want to have that lightweight, wind-resistant, water-resistant shell. It will be a life saver. If in doubt, fold it up, stick it in your waist belt, and take it with you. In 1999, a cool front moved through the Angeles National Forest during the day and by night time, it was drizzling. I left my jacket at Chantry Flat (74 miles) where the air temps felt warm. But as I climbed Mt. Wilson, and the climb out of Idlehour, wet branches dropped cold water on me leaving me shivering and hypothermic. Fortunately, a fellow runner had a spare jacket in his drop bag at the 90 mile aid station which totally saved my butt.

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Robert Harris

The one big difference (besides the obvious doubling of the distance) is the night portion (e.g. figuring out lighting). After multiple hundred attempts (with a smattering of finishes thrown in) I'd say there are really two main things I worry about. One is obvious; food. How can I consume enough calories throughout the night (especially when nothing seems appetizing anymore)?  I've tried a lot of strategies and still haven't nailed this one. The second big issue I have is getting cold at aid stations in the wee hours. At 2 a.m. muscles start to tighten as soon as you stop moving and the cold seems to creep in quickly. If you are going to have a crew, I suggest they have a blanket to throw on you as soon as you come into the aid station to retain your body warmth. If I don't do this, I have a very hard time starting to run again.  The longer the pause, the harder it will be to restart. Having the blanket keeps the muscles warm and allows you to start running immediately upon leaving the aid station without all the discomfort. If you don't have a crew, then maybe toss on a jacket you are carrying with you and try to get out of the aid station as quickly as possible (maybe send your pacer ahead to get stuff ready for you at the aid station so you can hit and go).

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Robert Baird

Good news: Since you guys have placed yourself on the ultrarunning fast track and really worked on your physical and mental conditioning over the past year or so, you will not have an extremely low point during your run in the San Diego 100.

Bad news: You will have (3) extremely low points. Everyone does. The trick is to tell yourself:

a. This is normal
b. I’m on schedule
c. Everyone feels the same thing
d. This is temporary

The 100-Mile finishers are the ones who fight through items a-d above.

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Carmela Layson

Have three goals in terms of your finishing times at SD100. Stay focused and don’t be disheartened. If Goal one slowly falls out of sight, focus on goal two. If goal two becomes impractical, re-focus on goal three. Expect to feel very bad at certain points in the race as you may experience some very difficult patches. Remember, they’re temporary and will pass. Don’t make a hasty decision on whether or not to continue when you’re feeling bad. Take a break at an aid station and work on getting your sh_t back together. Have a strategy for taking care of your feet, staying hydrated, getting calories, and maintaining electrolytes and execute it. And most importantly, never stop believing in yourself. You’re guys are solid, steady, talented ultrarunners and you’re capable of finishing strong at SD100.

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Ted Liao

Doing a hundred is more about problem solving and mental strength. Race plans almost never go as you planned as something unexpected or a problem always pops up. When you face a problem, think positive and be creative to conquer it. When you think negative, you will most likely crash and burn. Just keep your legs fresh and think positive. Do some mental exercises. Imagine the worst that can happen and how you would be strong and overcome it.

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Lori Heinselman-Craig

When you want to quit -- and you will at some point during the night -- just picture yourself crossing the finish line and how psyched you're going to feel about your accomplishment.  

Also, BEWARE the CHAIR! Lots of aid stations have chairs for runners to sit on at the later stages of the race. DON'T SIT DOWN!! Stay on your feet and keep moving thru the aid stations and down the course.

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Keira Henninger

BEWARE OF THE CHAIR. Whatever you do don't sit down and just keep pushing forward. Little by little, aid station to aid station. Do not look past that...one cheeseburger at a time baby!!! You are so fierce and strong! Think of all you've been through in life, all the struggles you've made it through. This thing is gravy compared to what a strong willed persistent person can do. Persistence, passion and will are far more needed in finishing a 100-Miler than talent. You're going to surprise yourself out there with the strength you have buried in you (and trust me it will find it's way out in the wee hours of the night). So, how's my concerned Sinead O'Connor look?

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Rob (Robo) Cowan

I would pack No Doz as a last resort - I had never used them before but at Coyote Two Moon they saved my butt when I started hallucinating and sleep-walking. I have a very strong stomach and had no side effects at all.

You are going to have so much fun on your first 100 - it is such a grand adventure and when you pass 50 miles (or whatever is your longest run to date) it’s just incredible to think with each new step you’re breaking your own personal distance record. All I can say is don't get too nervous or over think it, just go out there and enjoy it! You only get your first 100 once! Almost forgot, take 12 RECOVER-ease after the race so you can run on Monday.

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Jennifer (Jenn100) Forman

I luv 100 milers....I don't know why but I find them easier than 50-Milers. I think because your body just relaxes and gets into a groove and the time just flies by. Don't race it! Don't think of it as a race, just a long fun run.

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TRD HOME

2008 PCT50 Re-Cap #29

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If you’re not entrenched in the sport of ultra-running, the PCT50 doesn’t seem to mean a whole bunch. My Budweiser lamp neighbor thought the PCT50 was a NASCAR event. My mom informed us that PCT50 is the active, streak-free ingredient in Windex. And, my car detailer asked me if you’re supposed to smoke or snort PCT50; either way, he wanted two grams. You would think because the Pacific Crest Trail, conceived by Clinton C. Clarke in 1932, covers 2,650 miles from the Mexican border up to Canada, everyone would’ve crossed its path and remembered it. No such luck. Guess the PCT needs a Starbucks to become part of the collective conscience.

John “El Cubano” Martinez’s PCT50 is one of the most deceiving 50-milers on Earth. And again, due to the “no pain, no gain” mentality in ultra-running, that’s hunky dory. Maybe it’s The Run Down, but each year those PCT50 single-track rocks seem to swell in size and number; they’re alive and multiplying. Again, forget the official online PCT50 course description. El Cubano needs an extended timeout for that misrepresentation of reality. The PCT50’s gain of approximately 5,600 feet is so evenly spread that you’re climbing 80% of the time. Even when you’re lucky enough to find yourself running downhill, an incline pops up and you bitch under your breath, “You’ve gotta be kidding me!”

With the PCT50, you better not take your eyes off the trail for more than a few seconds. It’s so technical and undulating that if you lose concentration and get casual, it's kneecap pizza. The whole scenario makes it tough (again, a good thing) to get into a relaxed rhythm. There are a whopping four 200-yard sections that offer a groomed, sprintable surface but like married sex, it’s over in a flash and then followed by endless miles of fossilized triceratops spines.

And as if that weren’t enough, we had the distinct pleasure of running into three rattlesnakes perfectly coiled smack dab in the middle of the trail. Perfect! We need a few more challenges in these races, so poisonous reptiles were a welcome touch. But, after seeing one snake, everything else resembling a bent line became a snake. Two blue-belly lizards humping? Provocative, but a snake! Rock crevasse? Must be a snake. Random twig? Freaking snake! That’s the issue with so many San Diego Bad Rats milling about: The trail becomes a moving rodent buffet for attracting our dual-fanged friends.

If you had to park on the far side of the street bridge and walk in the cold a quarter-mile to the check-in station, that’s because “Team Armstrong” was hogging 17½ prime parking spots for his unauthorized Mobile Endurance Institute. Complete with chef, experienced crew, prime rib rotisserie and post-race ice pants, Jerry has more staff members than we have friends. It’s a good thing his prize winnings and sponsor float the boat; that would be his stellar wife, Team Jenn!

Let’s break down the course in layperson’s terms:

Boulder Oaks to Fred Canyon Road (6.6 miles) – Pretend you’re climbing an endless set of broken stairs. Great view on the right during the final two miles, uphill, technical.

Fred Canyon to Dale’s Kitchen (7.3 miles) – Hardest section of the course; a few downs but mostly uphill, very technical in spots, and no kitchen appliances in sight.

Dale’s to Todd’s Cabin (3.8 miles) – Shade and trees, finally; some flat areas but it’s the PCT50, so don’t get excited. Some short, technical uphill sections.

Todd’s to Penny Pines (5.2 miles) – Emerge from the forest to witness the nuclear blast fall-line of the Anza-Borrego desert on your right; a couple of rocky sweeping downhill sections and a short uphill section toward the end.

Penny Pines to Turnaround (2.1 miles) – Rolling terrain; you’re a mouse in an outdoor maze with a clear view of hamsters negotiating the trails.

Turnaround to Penny Pines (2.1 miles) — Dodge people coming the other way; nice downhill into Penny Pines for drop bag and/or pacer.

Penny Pines back to Todd’s Cabin (5.2 miles) – Two nasty climbs. The day’s sun is likely pounding the exposed ridge. On your left, the Anza-Borrego desert looks like a nice place if you’re from Iraq. Easy to see where PCT50 entry fees are going: Todd’s Cabins’ new look resembles a Ritz-Carlton beach bungalow; aid station staff wearing Tommy Bahamas.

Todd’s Cabin back to Dale’s Kitchen (3.8 miles) – Short downhill. If you feel like DNFing at Todd’s, there’s a good chance you can walk off the demons between the two aid stations; get up and get moving. Sorry about the 24-degree climb out of Todd’s, but stairs haven’t been invented.

Dale’s Kitchen to Fred Canyon Road (7.3 miles) – Feels more like 730 miles.

Fred Canyon to Boulder Oaks (6.6 miles) – You'll be in a much better mood when covering this section earlier in the day. While you're away, they'll bring in a few extra rocks. You’ll never be happier while running directly under a freeway bridge.

OK, Let’s check in with the other PCT50 cast of characters:

The Hulk showed up with neon-green arm sleeves that after a few miles got rolled down and looked like “Flashdance” leg warmers. Pacing iKarly, Dean Dobberteen would deny his client the hat request despite direct sunlight punishing her citrus Vitargo soak. Dean’s reply: “No way, I don’t have any hair gel, keep moving.” You’ve got to love those sacrificial pacers. We’re still not sure which one of the duo looked hotter.

We could write a novel about Tracy Moore (7:32). On Saturday, Tracy was moving with such ease it was embarrassing. When he passed us (going the opposite direction) we couldn’t spot sweat on his shirt or dirt around his socks, his hair looked groomed (sorry, Kirk) and his trail etiquette reminded us of Mr. Rogers. “Hi neighbor, can you say ultra? I like the way you say that. Today, we’re going to hang the sweater in the closet and grab our trail shoes. Come on, let’s run 50 miles together and see some of our favorite friends like Queen Sara & Henrietta Pussycat. Won’t you be my neighbor, could you be mine, would you be mine?”

Honestly, is there a friendly, more even-tempered runner in the universe? Forget the talent and training, Tracy gets the good-guy award and shucks the cliché, “Nice guys finish last.” Tracy would tear the PCT50 to shreds, leaving everyone and everything in his hospitable wake. Maybe we didn’t originally know it but from mile one, everybody — including some podium elite runners — were all fighting for second place; overall first was a goner. Tracy would smash last year’s winning time by almost 20 minutes (that’s two miles, folks). Look out, 2008 WS100 and AC100 – Mr. Moore, that’s Tracy Moore – is coming to a neighborhood near you and he prefers his milk shaken, not stirred.

Akos Konya (7:53) came in third. We're in shock but yes, did short Injinji stock on Friday. Akos is the epitome of mechanical perfection in motion; his legs and arms alternate in effortless synchronicity. Apparently, "The Matrix” was no science fiction movie. That’s not Akos passing you, it's agent Smith. “Mr. Anderson, do you actually plan on beating me today, all of me?”

Kyle Hoang's (8:01) longish hair and GENr8 yellow tech shirt appear to be working out for the downhill speedster. Kyle would beat his last year’s blistering time by 10 minutes and improve his overall finishing place by a few spots.

It's easy to spot someone who knows what they’re doing. Scott Mills (8:21) is one of those guys. From gear to course mannerisms, it's always about control, calm and light-hearted confidence with Scott. He should consider putting on a race or something. Scott noticed The Run Down tech shirts rivaling the Bad Rat’s apparel line in trail frequency and immediately slapped an injunction on all TRD wear for the San Diego 100 & Noble Canyon 50k. That's fine, we've got pink "Dancing with the Stars" CoolMax shirts that absolutely rip.

Iso Yucra-Rivera (8:41) would be the top TRD bidder for Runners World Magazine's Andrew Hersams' running jacket. At mile three, we caught up with Iso and demanded he immediately pay the $15.50 winning bid. He tried the old "You take Diners Club?" but we would have none of it and slammed his PayPal account for 50 bucks; those late fees are killers.

Let’s analyze Jerry Armstrong’s (8:57:39) post-race words of wisdom: “Ya think running a full marathon with that climb to the turnaround in 3:40 may have been a bad idea?” Jeez, we’re not sure! But, if trying to drop at Dale’s Kitchen was part of Team Armstrong’s intricate race-day plans, then we guess not. Jerry would hit his 15’ x 40’ trailer wall at mile 36.7. Cindy Yankee would pump him full of SPIZ, play a Tony Robbins clip and send him on his way. Jerry would rebound and finish strong. We’re guessing that a longer rig taking up 30 parking spots would’ve improved JA's finishing time. We can’t wait to see Jerry’s C-130 Hercules transport plane at the SD100. If you’re participating in that event, ride a scooter if you want to park anywhere near the start/finish.

Turns out Mark Barnett (8:57:49) is my boss' neighbor; yes, I hold a job. Looks like we’ll have to be polite to Mr. Barnett, who's obviously the real deal. Mark, let Bill Rubin know if there's anything you need for that cold.

One of the best trail climbers we know, Kevin Nasman (9:16), comfortably in second place most of the race, was the beneficiary of a Steven King-size asthma attack around mile 38. If this had been a 50k, Kevin would’ve surprised a few folks. He’s a scary solid runner and life coach for soon-to-make-his-ultra debut, 25k speedster Ryan Yohn.

Robert Schipsi (9:19) had a nice follow-up to a tough Leona run. He looks prepared for SD100 and is TRD's pick for a top-10 finish.

Ted Liao (9:50) stopped an errant Border Patrol bullet whizzing straight for Elijah Liao (11:41) as Elijah emerged from an off-path potty break. Both runners share the exact same surname but deny any blood lines. Life partners? It's running, we're cool with whatever.

Andy Kumeda (10:16) was the most relaxed guy on the course. Just look at Andy's oozing LA coolness while outside the Penny Pines aid station; he's doing a 9-minute mile right there. It's all so easy for Mr. C2M.

In Michelle Barton’s own words. “This is Dan Brenden and Mrs. Brenden.  He’s a maniac at hundreds...worse than Robo. He races like crazy and is running the Grand Slam this year for the 4th time. He always finishes, too! Dan’s taper for Western States includes two 100-milers (Old Dominion and San Diego). He’s great and his wife is a sweetie. He always carries her across the finish line. It’s really touching.”

It’s always good seeing San Diego Running Institute's Dr. Victor Runco (10:26) adjusting the course. The studly doctor always looks in control and The Run Down had the pleasure of hanging out with the overachieving physician near the turnaround. We would’ve liked to continue running with Victor, but his shoe-fitting crew nailed us at Penny Pines and we got stalled buying a new pair of Brooks and a sports bra; man, they’re good!

On the drive home, Robert Cowan (10:29) was pulled over and cited for operating a motorized vehicle while under the influence of RECOVER-ease. Robo is seen here trying to inhale the evidence. It looks like this was his half-day supply. We think Officer Armstrong was confiscating the contraband for personal gain.

Robert Harris (10:35) had to explain to TRD his scientific theory of moisture, heat, BTUs and energy loss as it relates to exercising and how it all rolls into wearing the proper shirt come race day. Robert wasn’t wearing a shirt during the PCT50. We're confused, but he does work for the government.

How many So Cal ultras will we have to follow Bud Phillip's (10:40) infamous white cloth neck guard up some rocky mountain trail? Evidenced by no photo, we've never actually seen his face as we're always behind the super senior. Bud's taking on a headless horseman persona with TRD.

Back to trail running after a two-year hiatus earning his master’s degree, Ben Stegner (11:04) was looking fit. We’re not sure how smart he got, as he was running 50 miles, but rumor is Ben can now name all the indigenous PCT plants in Latin. He must be fascinating to run with.

Jeff Gilbert (11:59) almost pulled a DNS but was reported to be eating all the good pieces of pork and the biggest slices of pizza under the finishers' tent.

Robert Baird's (11:56) second 50-miler in three weeks ended in success. We're not sure where on Balboa Island he trains but maybe there's a hefty pile of trust funds for hill repeats. Whatever he does, it's working.

Poway's Paul Escola (11:57) had so much Dr. Runco duct tape, bondo and staples adhered to both feet we doubt he needed trail shoes on Saturday. Paul would complete the PCT50 with a pre-existing injury most folks would’ve used for an excuse to watch the NBA playoffs. He’s a proud member of the SoCal Trail Headz, so what do you expect?

Does Dmitri Chechuy (11:59) own another race-day shirt? Maybe he’s sponsored by Pepto-Bismol or is hiding track marks with the long sleeves. We don't know but Dmitri, with plans of dropping, was kicked out of the final aid station by the hardcore women of the SoCal Trail Headz; girl power! Check out his, from the heart, PCT50 re-cap.

Xy Weiss (12:37) was dressed down for this year’s event. While she did give Kirk Fortini a quick table dance inside Dale's, her blue digs were in stark contrast to the leopard skin and pink Victoria's Secrets running gear we’ve come to know and love. Does the Dirty Girl look mad at us?

Eric Lumba (12:47) should have been home working on the SoCal Trail Headz new logo but instead used the PCT50 as an excuse to kick an imaginary case of "creative block." We have his email address.

Kirk Fortini (13:18) had such an easy race that after crossing the finishing line he would sprawl out on Old Highway 80 to even out his tan. It’s too bad all those pesky medical personal reviving him were blocking the sun. Kirk would do his normal post-race recovery routine and down an entire bottle of Listerine. Isn't it important to have good breath before receiving mouth-to-mouth?

Fred Pollard (13:52), with bib number protruding from his hat, reminded us of our car when we pick it up from the service center; number cone magnetically attached to the roof. Fred appears to be running well but with his weekend habits we're recommending he purchase an extended warranty. Fred's a legend.

When we initially spotted Glenda Kimmerly at Penny Pines, we began spinning in the morbid possibility that maybe we were still running in 2008's Leona Divide 50-Miler. Only after downing some Hammer Heed, with its varying flavor choices (unlike Gatorade, don't get us started), did we realize Palmdale, thank the good Lord, was more than 300 miles away.

We may have to change Ohio Bob’s nickname. He spends more time in California than we do. Bob was cruising the PCT50 course, giving words of encouragement to all the other Midwesterners who flew out for the event. Mr. Bob Combs would complete Virginia's Masanutten 100 in 31:20 (41st) the very next Saturday. We're begining to think he's from Kenya.

Pat Knoff didn't have a finishing time because he was too busy working his rear off. Normally, Pat's dragging Jerry Armstrong out of some mountain stream but today he decided to do something easier and just take care of a hundred runners. Pat personifies unselfishness and our hats off to him.

Did El Cubano physically move the entire race? We all ran 50 miles and his collective mileage appeared to be in the neighborhood of 145 feet. We can’t wait to bug John, who's pacing PCT50 sweeper Jill Childers in June’s SD100. Maybe Jill’s planning on some type of shortcut so El Cubano can keep up. That comment's going to cost us.

Yorba Linda’s endurance king Eric Kosters would tear up the initial 26 miles of the PCT50 only to discover blood in his urine; not good. If it’s a 50k he continues and finishes the race in the top 15. But, it’s a 50-miler so he wisely bids good luck to the field, hugs his family at Penny Pines, and sips a cold one while we stumble around Todd’s cabin looking for an IV. Who's the smart one now?

  What a huge surprise: Team Fierce - Michelle Barton (9:05:10) and Keira Henninger (9:05:50) would dominate their respective field while also trouncing 95% of the men. What’s their silly motto? “Girls rule and boys drool.” If these two were professional golfers they’d play on the men’s tour. We think they enjoy passing the guys more than actually winning. In doing some research, we discovered the name origin of VITARGO (their sponsor) and the acronym is all very consistent with their “let’s get it on” attitude; Very Intense Training Always Runs Guys Over. We should’ve seen that one coming. Overall first female (iMichelle) and overall second place female (iKarly) would be decided by less than one second per mile; think about it.

Marisa Willment (10:42) looked sharp in her color-coordinated outfit. Is it us or does Marisa look like buffed-out Linda Hamilton in The Terminator? No migraines (me-grains) for Marisa on this day but that didn’t stop the native South African from hurling Biltong. Are we boycotting the Sun City 50k? We can’t remember: Are we still supposed to be pissed off about apartheid? Marisa?

It happened again! My iPod DNFd at mile 38 and I had too much time for uninterrupted thought. Have you noticed the price of food and refreshments inside an airport? The charges ignore all economic factors just outside their walls. At the Oakland Airport, I bought the world’s worst tuna sandwich for $14.95. Where else was I going to go? What were my available options? The 12-oz. bottled water was $4.75. We pay these prices and nobody blinks.

The topic got me snowballing (easy to do). What could an aid station charge for a cup of water? I mean, if they played hardball? After running for five hours, I’d pay just about anything for liquid; $24.95 to fill my Nathan bottle, no problem. What would my available options be? No thanks, I’ll wander over here and dig a well. In fact, you could charge $100 for 12 ounces of water, as the alternative is dehydration or death. Talk about a captive audience! I’m just saying, there’s money being left on the table.

Sooner or later, all good things seem to come to an end. It’s not far off before you’ll need a swipe card or Mobil Speed Pass to check into an aid station with cumulative frequent runner miles for discounts on races or crappy, overpriced merchandise. Ultra technology is coming and with it comes added expense and hassle. The PCT is just a Cat 5 network cable connecting Mexico (386, 1MB RAM, 600 MG Hard Drive) with Canada (IBM Blade Server) and it’s a matter of time before secured transactions start competing for single-track bandwidth. $65.00 is a smoking deal for San Diego’s PCT50, but get prepared. The aid station’s business model could morph into Edwards Theater popcorn pricing, so start carrying cash or MasterCard for the ensuing $68 Heed, $105 PB&J or the easy payment plan on the finisher’s pulled-pork sandwich. El Cubano is here to help but he doesn’t take America Express.

Time for the Weasel List. The folks below should’ve run in The PCT50 miler but didn’t. Injured, family responsibilities, financial woes, race next week --- all a bunch of girlyman excuses. Everyone of these veterans can complete an ultra and finish in the top echelon on short notice. We’re not buying into their stories.

1. Dean Dobberteen – Felt pacing was better for overall skin tone. Plus, resting up for “American Idol” tryouts.
2. Lambert Timmermans – Needed a more remote run to increase odds of not making it home alive.
3. Bill Ramsey – Busy running some city called Dana Point. BFD!
4. Jorge Pacheco – Too close to Mexico! What’s that supposed to mean?
5. Kevin McGuinness - Carving out a new 50k, all-sand course on Coronado Island.
6. Dennis Koors – Saving himself for the SD100, where he’s announced he’ll beat Karl Meltzer’s 2007 time; Dennis needs to back off the RECOVER-ease.

As for my personal trail escapades, they’re never exciting. As a running neophyte, my race-day milestones are a bit off compared to the athletes in this sport. I did pass three hikers like they were standing still (they were); if only they could afford skis to go with those shiny poles. Almost beat 26-ultras-a-year Rob Cowan to the first aid station. My Garmin 301 crossed the motivational line by flashing “Are you indoors?” How slow do you have to be moving for a 133-million-dollar GPS satellite to ask if you've potentially ducked inside? Only wasted one hour throwing up with not one chunk hitting my coveted Solomon XT Wings. And, didn’t have to use the actual Ziploc bag as a final potty break wipe. All in all, a respectable day.

As expected, the SoCal Trail Headz showed up in droves. Congratulations and/or thanks to the following members for participating and/or volunteering at 2008 The PCT50.

1. Michelle Barton - Laguna Niguel
2. Dmitri Chechuy – Ladera Ranch
3. Rob Cowan – Coto de Caza
4. Chris Diaz—Coto de Caza
5. Alexa Dickerson & BF – Lake Forest (v)
6. Paul Escola – Poway
7. Pam Everett – Laguna Niguel (v, in charge of Greg)
8. Jennifer Forman – Riverside
9. Leon Gray -- Fullerton (v)
10. Kirk Fortini – Wildomar
11. Greg Hardesty – Silverado Canyon (v, tried to DNF)
12. Keira Henninger - Laguna Niguel
13. Eric Kosters – Yorba Linda
14. Ted Liao- Monrovia
15. Eric  Lumba – Newport Beach
16. Michelle Mecham – Huntington Beach (v)
17. Kevin Nasman – Alternate Dimension
18. Charlie Nickell – Ladera Ranch
19. Sue Rudolph– Huntington Beach (v)
20. Robert Schipsi – Laguna Beach
21. Ben Stengler - Murrieta
22. Marisa Willment - Mission Viejo
23. Beiyi Zheng - Irvine (v)

(v) Volunteer

If you want to experience the benefits of training with an organized, accomplished and focused trail running group, send inquiries to cgnick@yahoo.com or visit www.socaltrailheadz.org.

The Pretty Crazy Terrain 50 (PCT50) is a must-do ultra. All sarcasm aside, we love the event and every year have a blast torturing ourselves. There’s no pure out-and-back quite like it anywhere else in Southern California. The aid stations have classic spacing, are manned by experienced ultra runners and stocked with all the necessary goodies. If you plan properly and know what you're doing, the course is difficult but fair. We dig the red technical PCT50 shirts as you can do the fake Target employee thing and shotgun a few Mountain Dews while pretending to restock sodas on Sunday.

The PCT50 throws a lot of runners (including myself) into a tailspin. Folks fail to recognize that you’re running a ridge adjacent to the Anza-Borrego desert. Don’t let the trees and lush foliage in your field of vision fool you. It may be San Diego County, but you’re not at Solano Beach dodging great whites. You could, for all intents and purposes, be in the Kalahari as the moistureless air sucks water right out of your pores. If you don’t up your water and salt intake, you’re going to have a very rough day. Rumor has it smart guy Tracy Moore was taking five salt pills per hour and no, he wasn’t filming a commercial for S-Caps.

We think the sport of ultra-running may have been invented by women; it tends to be dramatically overcomplicated. Desert dune buggy racing: Bud Lite or Coors Lite? Surfing: Long board, twin fin, cold or warm water wax?  Cycling: Spandex Target or Cinzano jersey? Ultra-Running: Salt pills or electrolyte drink? Liquid fuel or energy bars? Aid station food or pack your own? Salt every 30, 60 or 90 minutes? Gel with caffeine? Ibuprofen or Aleve? Concerned about kidneys, or not concerned? Gloves no gloves? New shoes or broken-in ones? Keira stalker or iMichelle fanatic? Music no music? iPod Shuffle or Nano? Get up early and drive or stay the night before? Carbo load Thursday or Friday? Drop bag, no drop bag? Chill drinks or aid station ice? Red Bull or Monster? Handhelds or hydration pack? Wipes or leaves? Hat, visor or nada? Out fast or start slow? Sunscreen or tanning lotion…? It's neverending.

On the drive back to Orange County, I pondered the various things I could’ve or should’ve done differently. All those thoughts started swirling in my head and suddenly I was doing 35 mph in the fast lane. To mentally detach from the day’s events, it was time for a call home to touch base with my wife, Lisa. I dialed up her cell phone and awaited her familiar voice. Unexpectedly, my 2-year-old daughter, Bennett, answered the phone with a basic, “Hello.” I responded, “Hi baby, it's daddy, where are you?” And, in her unique wisdom she replied, “I’m here daddy, I’m right here.'' And all of a sudden, life was simple again.

Written, ran and reported by Charlie Nickell.

Helped park your car and edited by OC Register reporter Greg Hardesty.

2008 PCT50 Summary

When: Saturday, May 10. / 5 a.m. or 6 a.m. start.

Where: Laguna Mountains, CA (east of San Diego) bordering the Anza-Borrego Desert.

Race Director: John “El Cubano” Martinez

Course Description: 100% single-track run on the Pacific Crest Trail through hilly mountains ranging in elevation from 3,000 to 6,000 feet. Course features a 25-mile out-and-back and a working water faucet. Trained snakes courtesy of Zoboomafoo and extra rocks provided by The Home Depot.

Number of starters: 108
Number of finishers: 93
Success rate: 86%

The RECOVER-ease Top Finishers:

Top three male finishers:
1) Tracy Moore  7:32
2) Steve Cunningham  7:49 
3) Akos Konya  7:53

Top three female finishers:
1) Michelle Barton  9:05:10
2) Keira Henninger  9:05:50
3) Renee Roberts 9:20

For Complete Race Day Results Click Here.

Web site: http://www.PCT50.com

TRD HOME PAGE

RECOVER-ease Runner Rob Cowan

Rob looks a bit too happy for us at mile 60 during the recent 2008 Coyote Two Moons 100 Miler. And, just look below at the consecutive dates between some of his races. Running so many back-to-back ultras demands quick muscle repair. How does Robo take his body to the brink of complete tissue and then bounce back for more torture in such short order? Who's Robo's training and race day best friend? The answer is easy, RECOVER-ease.

Take a look at Rob's ridiculous finishing times!

1. 01/14 Arizona Rock n Roll, AZ, 2:56:32—93rd
2. 02/03 Rocky Raccoon 100, TX, 21:02:50—19th
3. 03/04 Montana de Oro 50K, CA, 5:53:40—3rd
4. 03/31 Yakima River Marathon, WA, 3:02:15—11th
5. 04/07 San Juan Trail 50K, CA, 5:37:48—7th
6. 04/14 Santa Monica Trail Run, CA, 5:19:19—3rd
7. 04/21 Ouchita 50k, AR, 5:10:48—4th
8. 04/28 Zane Grey Highline 50, AZ, 13:12:52—52nd
9. 05/05 Wild Wild West 50k, CA, 5:08:00—7th
10. 05/12 PCT50, CA, 9:18:00—9th
11. 05/19 Bishop High Sierras 50k, CA, 5:37:00—6th
12. 06/02 Kettle Moraine 100, WI, 21:53:50—13th
13. 06/16 Santa Cruz Mountains 50k, CA 4:57:33—5th
14.  06/30 Pacifica 50k, CA,  5:16:32—4th
15. 07/07 Angel Island 50k, CA , 4:20:49—2nd
16. 07/21 Tahoe Rim 50k, NV, 6:36:28--26th
17. 08/04 Burning River 100, OH, 20:49:11—4th
18. 08/25 Lean Horse 100, SD, 19:19:00—5th
19. 09/16 Big Basin Redwoods 50k, CA, 5:21:06—FIRST
20. 09/29 Noble Canyon 50K, CA,  5:20:24—11th
21. 10/13 Heartland 100, KS, 17:40:24—3rd
22. 11/04 New York City Marathon, NY, 3:02:54—951st
23. 11/10 Saddleback Trail Marathon, CA, 4:10:32—6th
24. 11/17 Catalina eco-Marathon, CA 3:50:00—11th
25. 11/24 Santa Barbara 9 Trails, CA, 8:24:50—19th
26. 12/01 North Face E50 Miler, CA, 10:23:52—28th

Rob is a good athlete but with RECOVER-ease, he’s a great athlete. Congratulations Rob on an ultra amazing 2007. We can't wait to see your 2008 statistics. TRD thinks somebody forgot to tell Robo that he's only supposed to run three marathons a year.

Order RECOVER-ease CLICK HERE.   

TRD HOME

The Perfect Fuel

It looks like The Run Down’s ultramarathon training and race day carbo load strategy of Jack in the Box tacos and double-stacked Suzi-Qs are under attack. Ultrarunning has exploded in popularity and with that comes nutritional refinement for peak performance; darn, we were just getting accustomed to dirty handfuls of M&Ms (they're all the same flavor!) and Lay’s Potato Chips. However, it looks like there’s a better plan – one that doesn’t require stuffing our face like a crazed homeless person.

In our extensive quest to uncover “The Perfect Fuel,” we had the distinct pleasure of interviewing nutritional guru Anthony Almada. Here’s what we learned or what we could comprehend:

***

Anthony Almada walks into the coffee shop wearing a technical shirt, shorts, running shoes and a white cap. He places his Oliver Peoples sunglasses on the table and sips green-tea lemonade. His eyes dancing with enough energy to make Tom Cruise look brain dead by comparison, Almada must have just come from a nice, long run – right? “Actually, I just came from the office,” Almada says, and immediately you think, “Damn! I want his job!” Maybe you could, if you grew up a science geek, earned a master’s degree in nutritional science from UC Berkeley, and developed, like he has, a national reputation as a nutritional and exercise biochemist.

Almada, 47, leads the company GENr8, which markets Vitargo S2, a product generating huge buzz in the ultra-running and endurance-sport community at large. “There’s nothing in it your mother wouldn’t approve of,” he says. Vitargo S2, a powder supplement mixed with water (shaken, not stirred), is the signature product of GENr8 Inc., the Dana Point company Almada co-founded in 2007. GENr8 spun out from a muscle metabolism laboratory within a prestigious university in the UK (the University of Nottingham), which secured exclusive rights to Vitargo in three continents. Three of Almada's partners live in the UK and the rest in the United States.

Perhaps you’ve seen GENr8’s DNA double-helix logo on the jerseys and shorts of elite ultra-runners like Michelle Barton or triathlete extraordinaire Mark Matyazic. Perhaps, as an ultrarunner, you’re wondering: What’s the big deal? Why should I care?  Why can’t I just stick to carbs and multi-vitamins? Well, you can.

But if you train hard, you stand to benefit by drinking Vitargo S2 before, during and after your workouts, according to Almada. Well, of course he’s going to say that. It seems that every week, new “miracle” products sprout up like so many demon weeds on a favorite single-track. Almada, president and chief executive of GENr8, feels your skepticism.

“There are a lot of what I call nutrition evangelists out there saying, ‘Here’s my product. Come to my church, and I’ll take you to heaven,’’’ says Almada. “But only about one in 1,000 products have any scientific evidence behind them to prove they actually work in humans.” Vitargo S2 is one of those products. In development for more than 10 years, there have been three published studies on humans to date to prove the product works. Indeed, Almada offers a lot of hard, cold science to back up his claims – not just misty-eyed proclamations. He adds, "Although we don't yet have university research studies showing Vitargo S2 is a superiour, super-fast fuel during training/competition, we do have university results suggesting that it could be. Moreover, every single person who uses our product during training or racing has remarked on how it provides a 'bloat-proof' fast-fueling effect." 

Sales trends suggest Almada’s no false profit. He says annual sales of Vitargo S2 are on track to reach between $250 million and $300 million in five years — not bad for a product introduced in March. Typical comments from those who have tried Vitargo S2 (like Barton and Matyazic) include “Wow, there’s something going on here!” AND, “This is different –– I feel a difference.”

So far, GENr8 has signed up more than 20 sponsored athletes, including ultrarunners, triathletes, professional surfers and windsurfers – even race-car drivers.

So, what’s the secret? For starters, Vitargo S2 – which comes in tubs that retail for $36.99 – is free of banned substances. So much for my crank-additive theory. A certifying organization, the Banned Substance Control Group, recently gave Vitargo S2 its stamp of approval. Vitargo S2 is a sugar-free carbohydrate supplement. Short of mainlining glucose, it may be the fastest muscle fuel on the market, according to Almada. Unlike with other products, there is little to no risk of bloating or “crashing” from a sugar high, he says.

Wake up and slam two scoops of Vitargo S2 mixed in cold water about a half hour before running, and your glycogen level in your liver will be topped off. This is important because your liver regulates the level of sugar in your blood, and you want blood sugar to be high to perform your best. Almada recommends that you drink 20-24 ounces of Vitargo S2 each hour while running to support fueling/energy needs, and another two scoops immediately after training to aid in your recovery.

Almada did not, like some mad scientist, brew up Vitargo in some laboratory. The product actually was developed in Sweden in the early ’90s. The GENr8 brand holds the exclusive license for it in North America, Australia, South Africa, Japan and the United Kingdom.

Almada does, however, very much know his way around the lab. He co-founded, in 1993, the sport nutrition company EAS — the first company to introduce creatine to North America. Almada grew up in Seal Beach. He was a self-described “geek” at Los Alamitos High School, with zero luck with the girls. He was forced to take the bus to and from school. He excelled, not surprisingly, in math and science.

Almada was a pre-med student at UC Irvine before he transferred to Cal State Long Beach, where he earned a bachelor’s degree in physiology and nutrition. Then he headed to Berkeley. Almada has a wife, Darcie, and daughter, Avalon, 4. His workouts of choice are surfing and lifting weights. He also is an amateur car racer.

The man leading the Vitargo S2 team in North America is training for his first triathlon. Come race day, there’ll be no surprise what Almada will be drinking before, during and after: Vitargo S2. “If you train hard, if you want to perform better and the next day not feel exhausted, you need our product,” Almada says.

He then walks out of Starbucks, hops into his white Prius, and is off – a science geek with business smarts who, unlike most of us, never has to worry about slapping on a necktie – let alone pants. He must be doing something right.

Vitargo S2 is available for purchase exclusively through about 1,600 GNC stores nationwide as well as www.gnc.com, through select authorized running and multi-sport retail stores, and directly through www.genr8speed.com. Current flavors are Natural Tropical Fruit, Natural Juicy Orange and Unflavored all as powdered drink mixes. Coming in the latter half of 2008 is a ready-to-drink version. We requested Apple Martini but got shot down due to the alcohol thing; isn't vodka an anti-inflammatory?

Written by OC Register reporter Greg Hardesty.

TRD HOME

2008 Leona Divide 50 Mile Run Re-Cap #28

On paper, the Leona Divide 50 Mile Run looks pretty basic. If you print out the spiffy online course map, it’s relatively cute: little red lines depicting “dirt roads” and a smart green dashed line for the soft and scenic PCT. Let’s see, we’re going to skip over here and then play hopscotch over there. Anybody for a game of freeze tag? Complete with two fishing spots and a slanted-floor Community Center, the course designer threw in a few highway crossings and the map resembles a shopping mall directory with designated aid stations serving free refreshments. Maybe we’ll cross paths with a Verizon kiosk and upgrade our cell phone skins with some rhinestone bling. Really, how hard can this thing be?

Maybe because paper maps are flat, we should stop referencing them. Sure, there are TOPO Leona Divide contour maps, but who comprehends them other than Michelle Barton’s genius father (iDad)? What are we supposed to do, memorize the various shades of green? Oh, if memory serves me right, this climb was part of the dark green sector so I’m supposed to power walk -- or was that run? What quadrant am I in? E7? Crud, you sunk my battleship! Honestly, you’d have to be in the Special Forces to gain anything from those micro-gridline publications.

What are we attempting to convey? The Leona Divide 50-miler, while a runable course, has some of the toughest sections we’ve encountered to date; forget we usually run 5ks. Apparently, the Lake Hughes area doesn’t allow mountain ranges with anything less than a 3-mile climb. The 7.5-mile incline from Lake Hughes Road to the #7 aid station turnaround makes traffic school look fun, fast and easy. Factor in the frontrunners blasting past you on their way down and it’s only a matter of time before you contemplate a new sport.

And, forget the supposed flat section before reaching aid station #10; definitely some shade of green on the TOPO grid. So, the 4-mile grind from aid station #9 to aid station #10 was simply brutal. There’s no other way to describe it. Find someone who enjoyed it and we’ll show you someone sneaking fanny-pack Vicodin. There should be a limit on the number of repetitive, identical looking switch backs allowed in these uphill sections. We made so many inside right turns going up this debacle that when it came time to finally turn left, we turned right and almost flew off a cliff.

Not to get on a tangent but my iPOD Shuffle DNFd at mile three so I had more time than normal to contemplate certain deep aspects of this run. At aid station #3, while guzzling the provided Gatorade Red, it dawned on me that the Gatorade Red tastes like the Gatorade Blue I had been drinking before the race. It made me ponder: How many legitimate flavors does Gatorade really have? The answer is one. With Gatorade, it’s more about the colors of Gatorade versus different flavors. In fact, the Gatorade marketing team is just making up flavors. I remembered buying Gatorade Frost. In hindsight, Frost doesn’t taste any different than Gatorade Rain. And why would they, they’re basically the same frikkin’ thing (water). And, what’s up with those names? Frost and Rain aren’t legitimate flavors; they’re weather conditions. We can’t wait for the debut of Gatorade Hail. We have nothing against Gatorade but let’s be clear (hey, Gatorade Clear!), there’s only one darn flavor of Gatorade and eight very deceptive colors. Order by hue and not by some goofy name. On the flip side, every Propel choice is the same exact color but all have legitimate different flavors. We’re telling you, Pepsi (they own Gatorade) is playing games with our minds just because most ultra aid stations serve flat Coke; it’s a conspiracy. Silence is troublesome for hours on end, I need my iPOD!

OK, got off track. Where were we?

All the usual suspects were in attendance. Let’s run thru the list.

Who cares what country Jorge Pacheco’s (6:29:15) from --- we want to know what  planet he lives on. His course record setting time was/is out of this world, especially considering he has to say “looking strong” about 160 times as he rips by everyone going the opposite direction. Politically correct lying takes energy (Gatorade Fib?). They should make an action figure and a PIXAR movie starring Mr. Pacheco. The yellow shoes on Saturday were smart and very Eric Clifton Jesteresque.

We spotted Tom Nielson (7:41:47) as he nonchalantly sauntered downhill a full eight miles ahead of us. But, something was missing. What was it? Oh yeah, his life coach, idol and personal trainer, Tracy Moore. Tracy (along with Tom) gives every ultra major trail cred but where was MR. 2007 WS100? AP reports had Tracy en route to the LD50, but the unexpected delivery of a family member’s newborn forced him to redirect. Somebody tell Tracy about the whole hospital doctor thing, which handles the newborn deal pretty well. We’ll cut Tracy some slack as kids are the only thing more difficult to handle than some of these races. We’d have to bum free gels off someone else today. OK, where’s the General?

Devon Crosby-Helms (7:44:18), the overall female winner, is from another state. We don’t personally know her as she’s always back in Oregon chatting it up with Krissy Moehl by the time we cross the finish line. Devon is a former collegiate star, played intense competitive basketball her entire life and stared in the 2005 documentary The Heart of the Game. Reliable trail sources tell us she’s sweet and a hardcore vegan; good, more Double-Doubles at In-n-Out for us. She’s super fast (duh) and wants to go to the Olympic trials in 2012.

If you recall, Crosby-Helms ran her first 50-miler at the Tahoe Rim “No iPODS or We’ll Kill You” and smashed the course record. She'll be running the 2008 WS100 for her first 100-miler and is going to tilt the candy c_ap out of Nikki Pinball. OK, we said it.

Christine Ensing (8:06:15), second overall female, is in the Navy (maybe she races DG), and has served in Iraq. She recently won Baz Hawley’s 2007 Saddleback Marathon. She, too, has or is attempting to qualify for the Olympic Trials, and Leona Divide was her first 50-miler. Christine was running Leona for her friend who is serving in Iraq so we can run without stressing about RPGs.

We missed the comedy team of Scott Mills (8:02:23) and Rob McNair as the Odd Couple rousted each other for who knows how many miles; rumor has it they both waited as the other peed. We have to be careful with Scott as he can revoke our entry into the Noble Canyon 50k and/or the SD100 at anytime. As Keira H. puts it, “Scott’s quads look like tree trunks but he’s such a nice guy.” As long as you’re not racing against him for the win, I’m sure that’s true.

Fresh off his first-place victory in The Old Goat 50k the weekend before, Rob McNair (8:24:20) was “cruising around” with his standard way-too-cool-for-email swagger. At 54 years old, he looks, acts and runs more like a 25-year-old. Rob actually acts like a teenager, but that’s aside from the point; he’s a living, breathing and still-winning legend.

We met up with our idol, Kyle Hoang (8:27:13), who was still wearing the Tour de France yellow jersey for winning the 2006 mountain stage on foot. Did we mention he’s fast?

Keira Henninger (8:38:07) --- where do you start with the iCarly/Hanna Montana/Christine Aguilera of trail running? Keira looks like she should be sitting at the beach in a thong drinking pina coladas and not kicking everyone’s booty on some remote mountain catwalk. Recently sponsored by GENr8 Vitargo S2, Keira’s running has ballooned into an entire new aerobic level. Maybe it’s the fuel or recovery attributes of the Vitargo S seeping through her slow carb veins, or possibly the fact that she trains harder than anyone else we know, but whatever the case, it’s working.

Fresh off The Old Goat 50-miler (seven days prior) where she easily captured the women’s title, finishing overall second to some random dude named Akos (that’s a joke), we’re not sure Keira had a full tank for Leona, but you try telling Amelia Earhart to watch TV on Saturday. You’ll have better luck convincing a vampire to stay in for the evening and having a stake dinner. In any event, Keira would take home yet another plaque, and her husband, Paul, needs to start contemplating a room addition for storing those bulky awards. The upcoming PCT50 needs to look out. If you’re a San Diego Bad Rat (Dean D), better snuggle back into that empty toilet paper roll or hide in some woodchips. “Bay Watch” is hitting the PCT near Mexico, and the only thing striking the ground harder than David Hasslehoff’s head as he passes out after 10 Jagermeisters is the sound of KH’s shoes, and she ain’t hanging around for autographs.

Willie Cooper (8:38:07) despite all the press and paparazzi associated from his 2nd place in “the unknown ?k,” remained true to form as he piles up quality miles for the 2008 Western States 100. Don’t ask him about the Saltwater5000 because it doesn’t exist unless you have a Ben10 Omnitrix and can turn into Wild Mutt. We told Will not to hide his Porsche key inside his right shoe for 50 miles but do CEO's listen to us? Put a sock on that thing.

Robert Schipsi (9:40:58) takes pride in beating his triathlete neighbors in running and is the only ultra runner we know who built an external home elevator to whisk him to his residence’s front door (Gatorade Lazyass?). Robert can run seven miles straight up to The Leona Divide turnaround, but three stories from the garage to his front door seems too much for the Laguna handyman to muster up. We’re confused, but he’s a deceivingly fast runner and cruised in on this particular Saturday. A personal bet with speedy Kevin Nasman that he would beat Keira left him short a six pack of beer; duh! He’ll probably brew it himself instead of buying it at the store. Enjoy Kevin!

Jennifer Forman (9:41:52) should have a license plate frame that reads “So Many Ultras, So Little Time, Get the Hell Out of My Way, You Freak.” The Run Down likes to eat, and our license plate frame reads “My Other Car is a Refrigerator.”  Jennifer cruised in with more existing aches and pains than someone recently hit by a Mack truck. Tell Jenn100 to take a week off and she just blank-stares; don’t want to know what's going on in there.

I wish we had a camera or microscope to display Dennis Koors’ (9:58:01) hair, or lack thereof. His feet still recovering from C2M, he would break 10 hours due to the follicle weight loss and aerodynamic nature of his streamlined cranium.

While it’s impossible to win every ultra you enter, it’s a shock to see Michelle Barton (8:24:01) come in anything but first place. It’s like watching Tiger Woods not win a golf tournament; all everyone wants to know is, what’s the matter? It’s called being human. Michelle is held to a ridiculously higher standard than anyone else we know. It must be brutal to go into every single race with the mindset of having or even wanting to win. But, that’s what she does. Hardcore competition is what the iMichelle is about. Another GENr8 Vitargo S2-admitted convert, Michelle runs half-marathons, 10ks, full marathons and just about any race where she can “get it on.”

If you didn’t know her and spotted her in Trader Joe’s buying daily supplies of couscous, you’d think she was a third-grade teacher and not some gal who would run over your back on some technical single-track. Michelle is wicked funny, smart and motivated. We spotted her once on The Leona Divide course and she was all business trying to shake last week’s The Old Goat 50k win (see a trend here?), which must have taken a toll. In 2007, Michelle won more ultras than any other female runner in the entire United States. How exactly does one top that feat? Stay tuned, we’re sure iM will show us the path.

Ohio Bob (9:59:31) (last name is Combs, but Ohio Bob is CA handle), with no mountains in his home state, had to fly to So Cal, violating his probation, to get in some hill repeats. A multiple Hardrock 100 finisher (don’t let the Captain Picard look fool you, no beaming from trail to trail for this guy), Bob is the real deal and does things one solid foot at a time. Well, it's back to Ohio for some stair repeats inside Crate & Barrel. Hey, you make due.

During an ultra, Rob (Robo) Cowan (9:01:54) never looks like he’s actually straining. We didn’t recognize him without his wonder dog Brandi as he leisurely bobbed and weaved down the PCT. At first glance we thought he was snagged on some brush but then realized he was just dragging Brandi’s empty leash; possible intervention here. Some reports had Robo on the Vitamin I support line from miles 20 thru 35.

Look out for up-and-coming Gina Natera! (9:08:28). We’re changing her last name to On-a-tear-a.

Bill Ramsey (9:16:09), fresh off surgery, would glide around, address everyone by their first name and then hang out like he was lounging around his living room. Bill is ultra running.

We think Fleet Feet Laguna Niguel Owner Scott White (9:23:02) had a stellar first 50-miler. It must be all the free running stuff he gets that propels him around the trail. Just imagine not paying for one single running item for the rest of your life! (Gatorade Freeloader?) Wear shoes once and then chuck ’em. Unlimited new fluffy single-use socks! Scott, you’re living inside our dream world and we’d appreciate an invite. Please, he even hangs with Michelle Barton. Some people!

Eduardo Robelo (10:05:26) was actually spotted at this event. His normal MO is to run undetected only to be seen in the posted results; very stealth.

San Diego sleeper cell Paul Escola (10:18:13) completed his first ultra in strong fashion. Who needs 50ks anyways? Next up, Badwater?

Dmitri Chechuy (10:45:39) would catch a dose of the ultra blues but hold on to complete his first 50-miler and qualify for WS100. With no water crossings, Dmitri still jumped into Glad Four-Ply Garden Bags for each highway crossing. Dmitri is caught here doing his Mr. Bean impersonation.

Robert Baird (10:46:42) was back after a two-year hiatus from 50-milers and cracked the 11-hour milestone barrier. The Balboa Island resident has yet to invite us on his yacht for green tea sandwiches and mimosas; maybe next year. Robert Harris' (9:47:04) main goal was to beat The Run Down. Wow, what an underachiever. That’s like beating a 6-year-old in a game of half court. He reached his goal with one leg tied behind his back.

We get the feeling that Catra Corbit (11:36:14) and Andy Kumeda (11:36:15) evaluate ultras like most couples looking for a good movie. “Honey, what do the Saturday ultra times look like? Oh, there’s a 50k at 5:10, but what about the late 100k at 9:15? You in?” If they had young kids, would they drive them to school or make them run?

Speaking of women’s hair, Kirk Fortini (12:15:28), fresh of his Old Goat 50 Miler (see a trend here?), was a tad flat for his Leona debut but the Wildomar Circle K protein product has zero tolerance for quitting. Barely escaping one cutoff, Aquaman would eventually snorkel his way downstream to the finish where he would then contemplate his PCT50 and SD100 strategy (see a trend here?). Kirk is scary tough but identify a more considerate and appreciative runner and we’ll tell you “try again.” The women’s hair comment was due to the fact that all women adore him. Check out Kirk's yellow jersey four days later on a training run. He wants to be Kyle so bad it's embarrassing. We think this qualifies as identity theft.

Pete Vara (12:43:04) completed his first 50-miler in his normal easygoing style. As we crossed paths, he took time to snap a photo of my legs and then entered me into the Aquafor High-Colonic World Series.

George Velasco and Leigh Corbin, fresh off their life-altering experience at the Marathon des Sables, forgot to change their watches off Morocco time and missed the aid station #7 cutoff by four camels left of the sun. Oh, my humus!

We respect him as a true champion but fortunately for Scott Jurek, he was a DNS. Doesn’t matter.Scott “I’m faster than Karno” would’ve been Scott “I’m slower than Pacheco” and clearly running for second place. We don’t comprehend Scott’s whiny take on Dean Karnazes. We think Mr. Jurek needs to take a marketing class. You see, when Scott runs through in first place, the crowd says, “Looking good, Scott.” When Dean runs through in any position, his fans say “Good looking Dean” and therein lies one major differences in being marketable versus being a prairie mushroom muncher.

Personally, we don’t get sucked into the whole Karno North Face media hype aside from the TNF, limited-edition doorbell we recently installed. In fact, sounds like I’ve got someone at the front door; “Dean Dong, Dean Dong.” And they say I'm obsessed.

The 2008 Leona Divide 50-Miler was a gem. The weather was perfect, with a thick marine layer and an occasional trail level cloud collision; dancing in heaven. While the race is extremely close to stunning (as in police stun gun) Palmdale, Lake Hughes --- for all intents and purposes --- could be a million miles away. The course is drop-dead gorgeous, with a great mix of PCT single track and manicured fire road. Ironically, there’s a 1,000-meter section of dirt road at the very start, which is the most technical section on the course.  We paid someone to carry us over this portion, but for the most part there were no major rocks to contend with. The aid stations were plentiful, properly spaced and stocked. We recognized many accomplished ultrarunners pouring Gatorade Red (it’s all the same!!!), filling up goodie plates, giving directions and offering words of sincere encouragement. We can’t speak on behalf of the other runners, but we noticed some of the same people at aid station #5 also manning aid station #9. In fact, we encountered this mirror volunteer phenomenon a few times during the race and wondered if we had died and entered some version of runner’s vertigo where you stumble from aid station to aid station only to be greeted by the same smiling person. Groundhogs Day!

The monogrammed Leona Divide blanket is top quality and we’re afraid of unclasping it for fear of not being able to roll it back up (personal issue). And finally, the technical finisher’s shirt hands down beats anything else you can ever get. Sorry, but the medals don’t come in too handy on training runs aside from scaring mountain lions.

And we love them, but what’s up with Mexico’s apparent national soccer team? (Lopez, Mendoza, Romero...) They seem to show up and dominate these ultras nowadays and April 19th was no exception. Is it me, or does this athletic crew conveniently choose not to speak English just during the actual race? We asked one guy how far to the next aid station and he’s politely says, “No comprendo.” We ask another guy if we can pass on the left, he responds “No hables English.” We ask one of the team members where the “el bano” was after the race and he eloquently responds, “It’s down the hall, but the floor’s a bit precocious so be careful.” Racing is game on. OK, we get it.

We also love the LD50 winner’s wood sign proudly displayed on the PCT. Why don’t they just get it over with and call it the Jorge Pacheco Plaque? It can then sit untouched next to Bob Kimmerly’s commemorative bench, which we thought was a classy and moving tribute to the race’s founder.

We’re unveiling a new feature within these reports called the “Weasel List.” The folks below should’ve run in The Leona Divide 50 Miler but didn’t for some ridiculous reasons. Injured, family responsibilities, financial woes, race next week, all a bunch of psycho-babble. Everyone of these endurance athletes can complete an ultra and finish in the top twenty on five minutes notice so we’re not buying any of their excuses.

1. Scott Jurek – Couldn’t locate an herbal ego remedy for 2nd place.
2. Dean Dobberteen – Had to wash his van.
3. Greg Hardesty – Had to wash his hair.
4. Kevin Nasman – Evaluating IRA options.
5. Scott McKenzie – Help Dean paint van after top coat dissolved with initial soap contact.

And, I finally won something in the raffle: a pair of Moeben Sleeves. I was so excited that I forgot my drop bag and bailed. Arriving home, I proudly displayed the white sleeves to my wife, who immediately noticed they were extra smalls and all of a sudden they didn’t belong to me anymore. What’s with this sport? It’s relentless.

As an organized running club, there’s no other Southern California group that supports local ultra & trail races more than the SoCal Trail Headz. A separate TRD congratulations to the following SoCal Trail Headz for participating in and successfully completing The Leona Divide 50 Mile Run.

1. Michelle Barton - Laguna Niguel
2. Keira Henninger - Laguna Niguel
3. Kyle Hoang – Costa Mesa
4. Rob Cowan – Coto de Caza
5. Gina Natera – Oceanside
6. Scott White - Laguna Beach
7. Robert Schipsi – Laguna Beach
8. Jennifer Forman – Riverside
9. Charlie Nickell – Ladera Ranch
10. Paul Escola – Poway
11. Dmitri Chechuy – Ladera Ranch
12. Robert Baird – Balboa Island
13. Carmela Layson – Gardena
14. Kirk Fortini – Wildomar
15. Pete Vara—Fountain Valley

If you want to experience the benefits of training with an organized, accomplished and focused trail running group, send inquiries to cgnick@yahoo.com or visit www.socaltrailheadz.org.

Did anyone notice the multicolored M&Ms at one of the aid stations? They’re all the same flavor! We’re being duped! It’s a huge scam. I feel a rant attack. Where’s my Valium?

Written, ran and reported by Charlie Nickell.

Edited by OC Register reporter Greg Hardesty.

Summary:

What: The Leona Divide 50 Mile Run

When: Saturday, April 19, 2008

Where: Lake Huges, CA

Race Directors: Glenda Kimmerly & Don Hughes

Course Short Description: Out, Out, Out, Out & Back!

Number of starters: 166
Number of finishers:  148
Success rate:           89%

The GENr8 Vitargo S2 Top Finishers:

The Men
1) Jorge Pacheco / 6:29:15*
2) Kevin Sullivan / 7:30:09
3) Oswaldo Lopez / 7:36:03
4) Tom Neilsen / 7:41:47

*Course Record

The Women
1) Devon Crosby-Helms / 7:44:18
2) Christine Ensign / 8:06:15
3) Michelle Barton / 8:24:01 (1st overall 31 to 39)
4) Keira Henninger / 8:38:07 (2nd overall 31 to 39)

For Complete Race Day Results Click Here.

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Angeles Crest 100 Trail Maintenance Work Re-Cap #29

Have you ever wondered what goes on during mandatory trail work (required by most 100 mile ultras)? The mystery is over. Here’s a short outtake during AC 100 trail work performed by Kirk Fortini, Dean Dobberteen, Keira Henninger, Michelle Barton and Jennifer Forman. It’s enough to make one consider returning to 10ks.

Kirk (thinks): Wow, it’s hot out here! Hope my hair holds up.
Keira (thinks): Can’t we just cut these instructions and run to the trail. Man, is it going it heat up or what? This cool weather blows for training. Kirk looks like he’s going to fall over.
Keira (says): Kirk, you look fantastic, especially your hair! Let’s go trim some trees, bring your FLICKER.
Kirk (says): Thanks, do you mind carrying my rake, it’s kind of heavy?
Keira (says): OK, but I’m already lugging Dean’s shovel, spare sunglasses, chair, portfolio and tanning lotion.
Michelle (thinks): run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim.
Dean (says): Has anybody seen my hair gel?
Kirk (says): No
Kirk (thinks): Dean has nice hair; wonder who his stylist is?
Jennifer (says): Are we going to start working here or what? Kirk, stop day dreaming. What the heck are you thinking about?
Kirk (says): Oh, nothing.
Kirk (thinks): Wow, Jennifer has nice hair too. I'm glad Hardesty isn't here. His locks would steal the attention.
Michelle (thinks): run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim.
Dean (thinks): I’ve never just walked on a trail before; people actually do this during an ultra?
Kirk (thinks): Is Dean thinking about me? Has a weird look on his face.
Keira (says): Dean, can you please move your umbrella?
Keira (thinks): I wonder if anybody’s up for 20 miles after this warm-up drill?
Jennifer (says): Where did Kirk go?
Michelle (thinks): run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim, run, bike, swim.
Dean (says): The RD mentioned there was some Oatmeal from 1981 in the trunk of his car and Kirk’s looking for it.
Keira (thinks): Only 90 degrees. When is it going to heat up?
Kirk (thinks): a bit stale but the textures good.

Apparently, aside from burning a few more calories, trail work chatter doesn’t appear much different than salon gossip. Maybe next time we better monitor bald runners.

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Coyote Two Moon Re-Cap #30

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PLEASE CHECK OUT THE FOLLOWING RE-CAP FROM OUR GUEST WRITER ROB COWAN.

Coyote Two Moon (C2M) has to be up there with just about the craziest most completely insane runs you could ever imagine. C2M was much more than just a 100-mile race; it was a weekend of sheer lunacy that combined an incredibly challenging run with some festivities and other wackiness that made for an unforgettable experience.

The events actually started on Wednesday, with a “warm-up” run on the Ray Miller trail and dinner that night, but with other commitments (work, family) I joined in on the fun on Thursday, which of course was Bowling Night –  everybody goes bowling before an ultra, right? C2M start times were similar to "the unknown ?k," with the slower runners starting at 4:00 p.m. on Friday night, and the super fast guys on Saturday morning at 6:00 a.m. –  the idea being that everyone should finish in the 4:00 a.m. to 8:00 a.m. window on Sunday – yes, Sunday morning. Hence the name “Two Moons”, since most runners had to run through two nights. I was in the middle 9:00 p.m. start group, and the RD was brilliant enough to put the same start group runners on the same bowling teams, so we got to know our fellow 2-Mooner group while thoroughly embarrassing ourselves on the lanes, all while munching pizza and swigging cerveza. The bowling star was Dean Dobberteen, but he must have used up all his energy since he was one of the DNFs in the 100k group.

After the race I headed to my brother’s house in Thousand Oaks, and managed a solid 10+ hours of deep sleep. I have found that a good night’s sleep really helps when running 100s, and I figured this time it was going to be especially important, since we were going to miss 2 full nights of sleep. Yikes.

The race briefing was held at around noon on Friday, and I drove over for the lowdown from the RD, picked up the bib and goody bag (really nice Patagonia jackets), ate plenty at the BBQ chicken lunch, left my 3 fully stocked drop bags, and headed back to my brother’s house along with fellow Marathon Maniac Van Phan from Seattle, to try and squeeze in a few hours of “bonus” sleep. I ended up with 2 ½ hours of light sleep, woke up and got a quick shower in just as pizza was delivered, and we chowed down to try and make sure we were fully fueled. Then it was back in the car and up to Ojai to begin.

The weather was in the mid-40s when we arrived at the start area at 8:30 p.m., and after going through all my gear, I realized I had inadvertently packed all my running socks in my drop bags –  oops! Fortunately, the Thatcher drop bags were still at the start line, so I was able to grab a pair and put on mole skin and toe caps to protect my feet. I wore a short sleeve, long sleeve, light jacket, shorts and gloves, and headed to the start line. Our start group members were bristling with energy, and with a few good Coyote howls we were off.

Having never run in Ojai, or for that matter even visiting there before, I had no idea where the course would go or what it would be like –  other than what I could tell from the course elevation chart, which was downright scary. There was a 1,500 foot climb in about 3 miles right at the start, which took us up to the ridge, and then a rolling uphill 6 ½ miles to the first aid station. It was very comfortable running, and I headed out in the front of our A3 start group with my new friend Steve, who I would see a lot of throughout the next 3 days.

The views from the ridge were spectacular at night, with the lights of Ojai far down below. A little under two hours we were at the first aid station, where I ate a few pieces of banana, filled the two water bottles I would carry all race long, and headed down to Sisar Canyon on fire road. When I say down, that's no understatement –  it was about a 3,500 foot descent and probably took a little over an hour –  the pace was pretty good with fresh legs. I got down to the bottom, ate a little more at the aid, and headed back up. It was early in the race, so didn’t see any of the 4 or 6 p.m. starters yet. Of course we got to see all of our start group, and everyone was in good spirits.

Along the way up I passed Steve, who had been ahead of me by about ¼ mile, and it was clear he was having stomach issues. He got those resolved and ended up having a great race. About 2/3 the way up to the ridge, the trail left the fire road and we were on single track for the rest of the way up. The ascents at this point were long but very runnable, and as I hit the top of the ridge I was the first from our running group to hit the aid station, where our crazy but lovable RD was manning the fort. Our directions at this point were to run up about ½ mile, turn right at the ribbons, and go to the top of Topa peak and retrieve a playing card that was next to one of those Halloween globes with the skull inside, and bring it back –  its 2 ½ miles round trip. I noticed the RD had his finger pointing way up high in the sky, and when I asked why he chuckled and said “You’ll find out –  and, oh, by the way, be careful as there is snow and ice and rocks that are pretty gnarly” –  okay…

So up I went, and as I looked up the mountain I could see headlights all along the mountain… way up there. So up and up we climbed, and the higher we went the more gnarly indeed did it get. As I passed runners coming down (from the earlier start groups) the warnings came in a steady stream –  “Be careful, watch for the ice, the rocks are treacherous…” As I hit the final couple hundred yards to the peak, it was all scrambling over snow and rock. I hit the peak, grabbed a card, and carefully headed back down. It was so treacherous that coming down took almost as long as going up, and as I headed back to the aid station I had some comments for the RD. I told/asked him 1) Did you say 2 ½ miles or 2 ½ hours? 2) Now I understand why the race waiver was so long 3) I noticed you have a remarkable resemblance to the guy in the globe, and 4) You were abused as child, weren’t you? He just laughed and sent me on my way. Oh yeah, I discovered that my perfect fuel for this race was a cup of instant mashed potatoes followed by chocolate pudding – gave me plenty of energy and kept the stomach nice and calm.

Next up was a few miles on the ridge, looking down, way down, on the lights of Ojai below – and oh yeah, what I call Coyote First Moon high in the sky illuminating everything. Then we headed down another long steep descent to Rose Canyon, a twisty windy, and as the RD said, very runnable single track. Just as I was about to make the turnoff off the ridge, Andy Kumeda was heading back to the aid station I had just left a few minutes ago. I thought to myself, dang, he is probably way out in front of everyone else, and we high-fived and shouted encouragement to each other as we passed. Then it was down the trail, and I started hitting waves of runners from the 4 and 6 pm start groups, and recognized lots of friends on their way up. I also got warnings that there was a tough stream crossing and it was extremely cold at the bottom. The descent went really well and I was lucky to have been carrying two pairs of gloves with me, so I put them on when I could feel the temperature drop and was probably better prepared than most, but it was pretty freakin’ cold at the bottom, and I spent as little time as possible at the aid station and headed back up as quickly as I could, warming as I began climbing. I decided right there and then to carry my jacket, extra shirt, two pairs of gloves, beanie, and tights the whole race, because I was scared to death of being caught without warm clothes when the temperatures got cooler later the next night. As I neared the top I noticed the sky begin to lighten, and by the time I hit the top daylight had arrived and I realized I had been running for 9-10 hours, covering something like 35-40 miles. It was about this time I began to understand how long we were going to be running over this crazy 3-days, and I underwent a subtle attitude adjustment as I realized that this was indeed going to be a very long haul.   

Next up (actually down) was the Thatcher School descent, another big 4,000’ monster. Think West Horse Thief (Saddleback Mountain) x 3. I saw plenty of other runner friends who were on the way up, and they did not look happy. All they would say is “you have a LONG way to go, and it’s a freakin’ bastard of a climb back out. As we would make our way down, and again from our birds-eye view from the top of the ridge it was a LONG way down, it seemed to get steeper and longer and you just knew coming back up was going to kill you. Now that we were starting to get towards late morning, the temps were definitely on the way up. When you finally hit the bottom section of this trail, about a mile from the aid station, it got really beautiful, with canopy, numerous stream crossings, and finally at the bottom one of the best aid stations I’ve ever been at. The volunteers were just awesome, they had all kinds of tasty treats, and it was hard to get your butt off the chair and leave. One thing about Coyote, I spent quite a bit of time at the aid stations refueling and re-hydrating, because this race really took it out of you. I was profusely thankful to the aid station volunteers, racked up a few more bonus minutes, and headed back out. By now it was HOT, and at each of the four or five stream crossings before the big climb up I made sure to soak myself to cool off. Then, it was up, up, and up, and it got hot, hot and hotter. Most of this climb was too steep to run, so I power hiked as best I can and made fairly decent time. I met Gabor near the top, who was on his way down and not having a good day, and we sat down in the middle of the trail and chatted and commiserated for about 5 minutes. We said our fair wells, I got passed by a couple of the “fresh” 100K runners near the end, but made the top in decent shape and was feeling good to be done with the 4th major climb of this race. 4 down, 3 to go.

As we returned to the ridge, we had a little less than a mile to go the next aid, and I had a resurgence of energy. Perfect timing, the song “Kryptonite” by 3 Doors Down came up on my iPod, and I blasted by the 100K runners who had passed me on the Thatcher climb and beat them into the aid station –  I truly felt like Superman at that point, almost 60 miles into the race.

Next was another ridge section and then a return down to Rose Canyon, but by a shorter, and of course, much steeper fire road. The evil and devious RD had warned us with a twinkle in his eye that we would be seeing Rose Canyon again, but by a much shorter route. My quick thinking said, “oh, that means you are going to kill us with an insanely deep descent” –  he just smiled… This baby must have been a 25% grade over about 2 miles, very steep and hard on the body, and when we reached the bottom it felt good to be at an aid station again. There were LOTS of runners here in various states of disrepair, and I’m sure some runners decided they had had enough and called it quits here. Tanked up and topped off, it was another grueling hike back up this evil hill. As always, the ascents seem like they’re five times longer than the descents, and the top just always seems to be around the next corner. Finally, we hit the top and had about another 2 more or less downhill miles to the next aid.

The next aid was Gridley top, and in my opinion this is where the race really began. I think we were around mile 66, and had probably the two toughest climbs of the whole race in front of us. It was now late afternoon, and the RD, who manned the roving ridge line aid station, asked how I was doing. I told him I was still running, although the course was doing some serious damage to my body. I chowed down on my Coyote Instant Mashers and Chocolate pudding, and headed out once again. I noticed the blisters on my big toes were becoming a big problem, as they were painful with each stride I took. The first descent down to what I called Gridley bottom was another long long haul, and all you could think was “I’ve got to climb back up this thing… shit!” I had to be very cautious going down, and had to walk some of the rockier sections because my blisters were becoming so painful. But I managed to limp down and made it into the aid station right about sunset. The aid station here was great as well, the volunteers commented on how good I looked and how well I was running –  huh? I chowed down pretty good on a burrito, bananas and all kind of other goodies. After some farewells at the aid station, it was back on the course, where I quickly caught up to two really nice 100K runners, Lisa Henson and Karen. Lisa turned out to be the wife of John Medinger, Ultrarunning magazine publisher, and Karen was also an ultra veteran, and as I led us on the hike out Lisa commented “We should be at the top in about 2 ½ hours.” OK. Great. Fine. Time to strap on the headlamps, the temp was now very comfortable. We also were joined by a guy named Mohammed, who was doing his first 100-miler at Coyote –  wow.

On the way up Karl Meltzer went flying by us like he was just out for an easy five miler, no effort, light steps, and then he was gone. It was kind of cool to be passed by an ultra legend, and know that you were doing the same thing he was doing (well, maybe not quite in the same way…). We were chatting and trading stories, they thought I was nuts for doing so many 100s, I was in awe because they had done Western States and Lisa had run Badwater, and we did hit the top right on schedule, 2 ½ hours later. We were at mile 80, 6 out of 7 climbs completed… only Cozy Dell left.

At the aid station I met my friend Karen, who was slumped over in a chair looking thoroughly beaten. I was surprised we didn’t catch her on the previous climb, as I had been seeing her the whole day and was slowly getting closer each time we passed each other. I asked her how she made it up so fast, and she said that when Karl Meltzer passed her, she decided to run up the hill with him. I asked her if she had lost her mind, and she said… Yep. This is what craziness can occur during an ultra, what poor decisions you can make when your mind is not functioning well. Karen was in the 4:00 p.m. start group, is a strong, steady but definitely not fast runner, and she ran about 4 miles at Karl "Mountain Goat" Meltzer pace! Karen has had some heart problems in the past, and I was really worried about her. So all of us went out as a group, headed up to the top of Nordoff Peak, and then down to Cozy Dell, probably the hardest 15 miles (7.5 up, 7.5 down) I think I have ever done in my life.

At the top of Nordoff Peak, you have a fantastic nighttime view of Ojai –  fantastic because you are so damn high, and because Ojai is so damn far below! You can see all the way down to the bottom, these twinkly little lights, and all you think of is how many bad words are in your vocabulary. Things were really starting to bunch up on the course, and there were lots of runners on the way up and the way down. I started off running, well my best impression of running anyways, but the blisters were now ripped open, bleeding, and excruciatingly painful. Although it should have been an easy 2 hour descent, probably 80-90 minutes on fresh legs, it took me 3 hours to get to the bottom, and to make matters worse the last couple hundred yards were rock climbing over boulders to get to the aid station. I slumped down in the chair, totally exhausted and in pain, and knew I had to do something about my feet. I was hoping a change of shoes, socks, and liberal use of duct tape would do the trick. As I pulled off my shoes and blood-encrusted socks, one of the volunteers commented that “I looked in pretty bad shape –  thinking of calling it quits?” I looked at him and said “No fu%#ing way! I came all this way and there's no way in hell I’m dropping now.” He high-fived me and said “That’s what I want to hear!”

I fixed my feet up as best I could, downed some soup to warm up, crossed my fingers, and headed out of the aid station. The first part of the trail at the bottom was relatively flat, except for the rock section, and as I tested my feet I thought.. “Not bad.” So I was able to throw in short spurts of running mixed in with lots of walking, and began some serious hiking as I headed up the trail. I noticed that I was not getting both physically and mentally tired, and later found out that some of the other runners had to drop due to sheer exhaustion. I began some light head bobbing and lots of yawning, and then began… hallucinating! Yes, I can now vouch for real that people hallucinate, as I started seeing elephants turn into rocks, Indians dancing on the side of the trail, and why is there a billboard in the middle of this trail? I was worried that I was going to walk off the side of the trail, or have a heart attack from my strange visions. Fortunately, I had been warned about this and had some No Doze in my fanny pack, so I popped one, and within literally two minutes had my mind back. This was good and bad, since now my mind was refocused on the task ahead… climb, climb and keep on climbing.

Surprisingly, I think because my feet were in much better shape, the climb out did not seem so bad, especially knowing there was an aid station at the top, and after that a little less than 4 miles to go. What was weird about Coyote is I never really thought about how far I was going, it was perhaps just a little too much for my mind to fully comprehend. Because of the distinct and challenging out and back climbs, you really did break this race into small sections, and just handled them one at a time. Anyways, it was great to hit the top of Nordoff Peak, one mile to the next aid, whoohoo there are the aid station lights, I’m back! I fell into a chair, four full hours after I left Cozy Dell, felt the deep inner satisfaction that I knew this race was in the bag, and recalled that the aid stations were fully stocked –yes, fully stocked, so I spent about 10 minutes savoring the moment and downed a Fat Tire beer –  man, did that taste good! I thanked the RD, now in a bunny suit (help me out of this thing… I gotta pee!) for the incredible job he had done and how much I enjoyed the race. Then it was off into the night again, about 1 ½ miles of climbing, then a little over 2 miles of descent to that marvelous finish line. With no hurry, not a care in the world about my time, I made my way running and walking down the hill towards Rancho Grande and the finish line, and with about ¾ miles left started to run into some of the volunteers who were out on the course cheering us on and guiding us in. I was hoping to finish before sunrise, and as I began to hear the sounds of the finish line, my spirit lifted and I knew I could run the last ½ mile without stopping. As I approached the finish line, I let out a big Coyote howl and it was done. My finish time was 33 hours and 3 minutes. More that 50% longer time-wise than my previous slowest 100. Wow. I ended up "unofficially" in 20th place out of 45 finishers and 67 starters - unofficially, since Bonus Minutes were not included. I later found at that my official time was 31:03, shaved 2 full hours off my time, and I moved up two spots to 18th. Nice.

I hung around the finish line, downed 12 RECOVER-ease, tried to stay warm in the sub-30 temperatures, and just sat around talking with other runners and cheering the finishers as they came in, sometimes in groups but mostly one at a time. Later in the morning we had a post race breakfast and more crazy festivities, and then the awarding of those coveted finishers buckles. That is one beautiful and hard-earned piece of metal that I will always cherish.

Robo

Written, ran and reported by Rob Cowan.

Edited by Charlie Nickell.

Summary:

What: The Coyote Two Moons Ultras

When: March 21-23, 2008

Where: Ojai, CA

Race Directors: Chris Scott

Course Short Description: Totally Nuts!

Number of starters:  67
Number of finishers:  45
Success rate:          67%

Top Finishers:

Overall 100 Miler
1) Karl Meltzer / 17:24:00
2) Derrick Carr / 20:50:00
3) Andy Jones-Wilkins / 22:58:00

Overall 100k
1) John Medinger / 12:23:00
2) Tom Nielsen / 12:38:00
3) Tracey Moore / 12:43:00

For Complete Race Day Results Click Here.

TRD HOME

the unknown ?k Re-Cap #27

To avoid a conflict of interest and to keep our re-caps objective we occasionally enlist a race-day participant to document the event. And so is the case with "the unknown ?k" 2008. You may recognize Kirk Fortini from this 1996 analog photo when he starred as DC Comics’ Aquaman. It’s been slow for Aquaman since the high-tech superheroes arrived. How do you compete with the Transformers, The Incredibles or The Power Rangers? Ah Kirk, we mean Aquaman, how much damage can those ridiculous water balls you throw actually inflict? Who are you planning on knocking out? One certain clown fish? Anyway, Aquaman has time on his webbed hands and was kind enough to share his summary thoughts on the unknown ?k with our readers. As you’ll see, he writes well for being 2000 Leagues Under the Sea but then again he’s been swimming in a school his entire life. We told Kirk to try out for the lead in The Little Mermaid IV but apparently his sea horse blew a fin and he missed the tryouts; saga, drama... The Run Down unknown ?k 2008 Guest Re-Cap DISCLAIMER: Any resemblance to actual athleticism on the part of the author is grossly exaggerated and purely coincidental. No guarantees as to the truth of reported anecdotes is given or implied, and neither should the reader assume one. So there. Being a sea creature of habit, March 15, 2008 started out as essentially every day does: alarm goes off, swear a little, scratch, grumble at being awake. Swear some more, brew coffee and swear until I can pour the first cup. You get the general idea. To gain a little perspective on a day that was only in its infancy, I reflected on a couple of historically significant events that took place on this exact date: 44 BC - Julius Caesar, the Roman emperor largely responsible for the calendar that we use today, was assassinated in the Roman Senate in the Portico of the Pompeii Theater. 1970 - My oldest sister-in-law was born. 1981 –  Duran Duran is launched and I considered identity theft with Simon Le Bon; don’t have a sailboat and any loose-fitting pirate shirts, so scratch the lame idea. 1996 –  KFC biscuit honey packet is accidentally used by a bonking street runner and the energy gel is born. Well, the Ides of March has definitely seen its share of tragedy and misfortunes unfold. But, then again, it seemed like just a good a day as any to go for a drive and a run off the South East side of Saddleback Mountain, California. Designated as protected wilderness in 1984 by President Reagan, this particular area spans some 39,000 acres and is home to more than 90 miles of hiking trails and a dozen streams. Maybe I'd even run into other like-minded souls, and we could enjoy a group run that would cover a fair amount of those miles. Remembering that the Forest Service and races don't always read from the same sheet of music, any encounters would have to be treated largely as a matter of serendipity. Out the door and up the infamous Ortega Highway, it was a pretty uneventful drive. That was good, I thought, and hopefully portentous of the day's events. There was a brief scare, though, when a large black Jeep SUV swooped in behind me on the serpentine asphalt like Darth Vader's TIE-fighter. Not giving it much thought at first, the instinct for self-preservation kicked in when I saw the red dot from their laser-sighted Glock dancing across my dashboard. Better to let this road-rager pass on by. I didn't get the license plate number, but I saw the words "Trunk Monkey" on the license plate frame. Unfazed, it was not long before I pulled my orange Dodge Gremlin into a parking lot on Highway 74 across from a little place called The Candy Store. And, imagine that, at 5:30 a.m. there were other people milling about. They were trail runners, too. What a total coincidence; really! Even at this early hour, the senses were fired --mainly, the sense of smell. The olfactory assault mounted by those parking lot bathrooms forced the conclusion that time of day matters little as to their stench. Alright, enough with the subterfuge. The one and only reason we runner-types were starting to assemble was that we were preparing to participate in a one-of-a-kind, uber-exclusive official (don't know how I made the list), limited field event dubbed “the unknown ?k.” The Forest Service is the kind of humorless arm of the government that frowns on people conveniently misinterpreting the rules to hold events, preferring they navigate a labyrinth of permits, back-alley bribery and pointless insurance bonds. So, officially, today's festivities would occur under the strictest code of silence. Naturally, the race and/or “ultra” would release the cloking device sometime after everyone had safely finished, packed up and left, and nobody was arrested. This last part was of particular interest to the man whose vision and energy gave birth to the concept; the unknown RD. Those last hours and minutes of pre-event preparations are the same, no matter the name or distance. All of the electronica pours out. For all of our collective need to get away from it all, it would seem that runners are about as wired as the next guy. We have all manner of devices to measure heart rate, distance traveled, global positioning, PH balance, HIV status and the passage of time. Gone is the day when you'd have to endlessly flip bulky cassettes in a Sony Walkman. There are MP3s now. And, don't forget your Web-enabled cell phone. Who'd want to miss an important call, IM or some SPAM while on the trails? Well, lacking all of these media things, I had planned for this contingency by sneaking into my son's room before I left and stealing his Ben10 Omnitrix (those of you with kids will understand). A bulky little gadget, it could pass muster as a GPS on roids or even an avant garde wristwatch. Thankfully, the pre-dawn hour would spare me the humiliation of flash photography. Hair still in curlers, I wasn't ready for the glare of camera flashes normally reserved for occasions such as the Oscars, or a typical day in the life of Britney Spears. Being a slower-moving mammal known for drafting behind tortoises, I was slated to take an early start at 6 a.m., along with several others. Milling about, our athletic assemblage was geared up with time to kill. We all made idle conversation, greeted one another, hugged old friends, and shook hands with new ones. Pete Vara, Aquaphor poster boy, was generous in his dispensation of Eucerin and Aquaphor samples. In grateful acceptance, I assured him that I and my nipples were indebted to him and that next time, I’d really prefer applying the crotch lubricant myself. But, thanks. Man, his hands were cold. Talk about shrinkage! As the last moments ticked down, and the start time drew near, we received our final pre-race instructions. They were the standard-fare admonitions against littering, not abusing the aid station volunteers or each other, not following Kirk, and not soaking our grubby hands in the ice meant for consumption. If we were stopped by Forest Service personnel or Jason Bourne, we were to protect the RD from incarceration by maintaining silence and swallowing the cyanide-electrolyte capsules provided to us. And, I like to think that it was an accident, but why did the RD have to shine that headlamp of his into my eyes as he spoke? Did he enjoy seeing me squirm in my blindness? No matter. The start was imminent, and we had yet to receive our Pokémon card.That's right, Pokémon card. If at any time another participant asked to trade cards with you, you had to oblige. One was going to be the money card, sought after because it was worth a new iPod shuffle. Two other cards were to be worth free entry into next year's "supported group run." Hmm, it kinda reminded me of looking for the golden tickets hidden inside Willy Wonka Bars. Shortly after, I was narced out as having the iPod money card. We were led across the highway and then sent off into the morning chill, our covert endurance challenge beginning under cover of darkness. Once on the course, it dawned on me that the trail wasn’t marked with traditional ribbons. The trail was, in fact, totally unknown. How would we find our way without ribbons or chalk? It was scary, yet exciting. The event name was starting to make sense. Or, nonsense. Our progress slowed somewhat by the lack of sunlight, several runners started out with their headlamps. Partly because I was just too damned lazy to carry mine to our first aid station, I had left my bathroom tinkle light at home. Instead, as I followed the bouncing orbs of light, we marched upward for a mile or so on the B__r Ca_yon Trail and made small talk. Michelle "It's For My Glaucoma" Mecham was a pharmaceutical representative participating in her first ultra. Just four weeks shy of her 30th birthday, she had the distinction of being the youngest member of our group, and of making me feel about two days older than dirt. I noted her for a potential source of Vicodin samples. Lisa Kuecker (8:31:00) started out with a headlamp, but didn't really need one. Her eyes held such a piercing, laser-like quality that not even the shadows dared obstruct her vision. Or, maybe she was just trying not to make eye contact with me. Approaching legendary status Andy Kumeda, through judicious misrepresentation of the distance (told it was going to be a 100 miler), was on the course preparing for the Coyote 2 Moon 100-Mile; where he would finish overall 5th!!! His better-half, Catra Corbitt, a veteran of so many 100' that the list rivals the length of one of her sleeve tattoos, was there, too. For sheer grit and intensity, you'd be hard-pressed to find her equal. She first came to my attention at the 2006 Javelina Jundred, where she was pacing Xy Weis and I bore witness to her barking orders for the Dirty Girl to hurry up. Gulp. Unconfirmed reports place her and Greg Hardesty (6:31:00) at the scene of a tattoo comparison, he with his sissy shoulder tattoo against her Map Quest tapestry of ink that reminds me of the popular "I Spy" book series. For Catra, all course metal detectors were shut off and the TSA employees sent home. Leigh Corbin and George Velasco moved along at their own pace with nothing to prove, just a scant few days away from departing for a grueling multi-day event in the Moroccan desert, the Marathon des Sables. Eric Klingsporn, newly engaged, would be one of three people who would spend their time out front all day, and was the first from the early-start group to cross the finish line. Robert Baird, a genuine pleasure to spend the miles with, was living proof that the biggest battles are often enough fought off of the trails, and not on them. A regular pillar of strength, he's an integral part of supporting his wife on the road to recovery from breast cancer. Motoring along, nary a word of self-pity fell from his lips. He would also spend the day as one of the out-front three. Kirk Fortini, long-haired reprobate and subject of a course-marking photo scandal, I was far removed from my element. Most of my races reflect firm back-of-the-pack status but, for most of the day, I enjoyed the fruits of the 1 1/2 hour staggered start by being the guy out front. Not daring to entertain delusions of even mediocrity, I knew without a doubt that someone could easily overtake me if they so decided. One slam of the Omnitrix could instantly end this SGR but would also be un-sportsman like maneuver. After the initial few miles, we found ourselves at a clearing and headed right, toward the area called 4 Corners. The confluence of 5 separate trails, one could only assume that whoever named that spot was under the influence of alcohol or strong pharmaceuticals (don't blame Michelle M.). After a brief pause, we headed straight over the numerically-challenged spokes of this trail hub, onto T_na_a Trail North. There was a brief portion of incline, to be followed by roughly 5 miles of descent. Here and there, it was impossible to miss the telltale signs that pointed to a serious lack of traffic. Moderately rocky in places, the slightly overgrown brush told you that there weren't many intrepid spirits who ventured out there. Undeterred, we sacrificed ankles and my Flash Dance knee warmers to the trail gods and forged ahead, thinking that in some small way we were clearing the path for those who would shortly follow.    For the effort, we runners were rewarded with what was a section of steep descent and some hairpin switchbacks. How there came to be two mountain bikes at the top, no owners in sight, we dared not speculate; no vehicles or mountain bikes are allowed in this sanctuary. Rather, we gave not into temptation, and spread out as we headed down. In brief isolation from the rest of the pack, I was privy to an explosion of color that would rival the palette of any renaissance master. Flowers gorgeous for their range of purples and oranges were set against a backdrop of every green hue imaginable. As they unfolded their petals to reveal their blossoms, they invited metaphorical comparison to the runners and the aspects of their respective personalities that would be revealed as the day progressed. Gently swirling, it seemed as if the breeze was carrying wayward souls to their destinations on spectral winds of propulsion. Not even the passage of time seemed to hold sway here, as feet didn't seem to fall to soil so much as the soil rose to meet them. To gaze in awestruck wonder at nature's majesty below, even the valley depths were dissected by a meandering creek; its shoulders lined with timber and rounded stones. Lost in reverie, I was brought back to reality when at last I reached the end of the descent and found myself at the San M_t_o Creek bed. Joined shortly by Eric and Robert, we three scrambled over the stones and headed for our next junction in the trails. Aside from a few key rock stack pyramids, the course wasn’t marked. Did I already mention that? A detailed map with photos and transition descriptions worked beautifully. There would be no need to sweep this course since it wasn’t an “event”. Ribbon and chalk was replaced by personal navigational logic and runner intuition. Or, you could just follow the smart guy in front of you. Shortly, we arrived at the intersection of the San M_t_o Trail and Te_a_a Trail South. A right turn up Te_a_a South began our first of two out-and-back segments and would ultimately lead us upward to our first aid station. By this time, our thoughts turned to when the first runners from the later-start group would be encountered, and just who would be out front. My money was on San Diego superstar Dean Dobberteen, notable as an upper-crust sort of runner absent of uptight pretense and about as nice as any you'd meet. More than Dean, though, I was concerned about being stampeded by the legions of groupies that were sure to follow in this chick-magnet's wake. By the end of the day, I found out, Mr. Dobberteen still had to report for work as a rickshaw runner at Universal Studios. I guess that’s his version of a same-day recovery run. Onward and upward we went, subjects of conversation ranging from the aforementioned to marriage, work, family, and that most mortal of all trail sins, "crop dusting." My spirits buoyed by perfect weather, a beautiful course, and the sort of synergy found only with extraordinarily good company, the initial 3.5 miles of this first out-and-back went by in a blur. In places, the wilderness closed in on us, forming a verdant canopy that allowed in just enough ambient light so as to illuminate the mossy rock faces on one side and fern-covered slopes on the other. In unspoken agreement, conversation had to cease while our senses were being thus engaged. Aside from the new indoor outdoor carpeting in my formal living room, this was some of the nicest single-track any of us had ever ventured onto. In what seemed like no time at all, Aid Station #1 was in our sights, cleverly disguised as a group picnic complete with mannequins. The parking lot at the trailhead even boasted a couple of SUVs to lend itself authenticity. Wow, yuppie-flage! I was ravenously hungry by now, and all of the food looked like manna from Heaven. The ladies whose angelic grace was surpassed only by their selfless attention to the runners were ultra-marathoners Marisa Willment and Pam Everett. Both of these ladies were no strangers to the scene, and it was humbling that they would give up their time in service to us. Marisa will be remembered as the one who brought along what was to become the unknown ?k mascot: a little critter that looked like an alien, it gave musical accompaniment to the faux-picnic. Listening to the trance music, however, made me think that this party was missing some Ecstasy and glow-sticks. Nevertheless, I was starved. So, while my bottles were filled, I dislocated my jaws and started shoveling peanut butter & spun honey sandwiches into my cake-hole, followed by a chocolate-dipped strawberry, and washed it down with a couple of cups of Coke; Red Bull, Monster, Cherry Pepsi and Pepsi were also available. Perhaps sensing that I was going to continue feeding to the detriment of the other runners, the staff formed a plan to put a stop to it. In what could only be described as traumatizing, someone began dancing to the pulsating electronic beat coming from the mascot, hips undulating off beat like some bad dance show contest. My appetite effectively suppressed, it was time to go. The retina burn subsided as we headed down what was once an uphill. It was going to be a relatively short 5.5 mile trip to the next aid station. Somewhere within the first 1 1/2 miles, we finally saw the contingent of fast-movers. Out front was Aussie Martin Brooks  (6:12:00). A lifelong runner and participating in his first ultra (can you believe that?), Orange County’s version of Paul Hogan would go on to win the whole shebang. Covering ground as fast and as lightly as a Jesus Lizard, his feet were never even moistened at the water crossings. Willie Cooper was unknown (no pun intended) to me before today, but he would eventually go on to lock in a strong second-place showing. With an obvious affinity for exclusive events invitational in nature, he was also a veteran of the coveted Saltwater5000 (which he co-founded); Rob McNair has nothing to do with that run. Robert Schipsi, despite not having felt well, showed up wearing gear of his own devising and would place 3rd overall. And, as though beauty had somehow been captured in stereo, Team Fierce Michelle Barton & Keira Henninger ran in tandem. These two mileage queens are reverse- diabolical as they nice nice runners to death by lulling them into a sense of bliss with their enthusiasm, smiles, camera poses and overall gleefulness. Grinning so brilliantly as to be cause to avert your gaze, these two were decidedly loud this day in their celebration of life. If you were in earshot, it wasn't unrealistic to have a contact high, of sorts. Make no mistake, though. Cross either one of these ladies on a trail, and they'd hurt more than your feelings. Despite resembling Hannah Montana & iKarly, Team Fierce protects a lead when racing like a mother bear standing up for her cub. You can try rolling up into a motionless cannonball but prepare for some GENr8 Vitargo spray upside your melon. Lick it up; you’re going to need its recovery attributes. I had never been privileged enough to meet Gina Natera before today, but she was running with the proverbial big dogs. Finishing in the exact time as Michelle and Keira really says something. Kevin Nasman is a guy so scary smart that I figured he was listening to an audio philosophy or physics book on his MP3 player. Michael Crescenti, a coworker of the iMichelle at Fleet Feet Laguna Niguel, cruised along in complete control of his first ultra. No doubt, the guy will be more than ready for this year’s Leadville 100; Bad Water must have sold out. Greg Hardesty, still longing after the experience that he had at  the Coastal Challenge in Costa Rica, glided over the terrain wearing his still unlaundered hydration vest (festooned with howler monkey crap). Let it go, Greg. Wash that thing and live in the now. Dmitri Chechuy, whose vowel-deficient first name sends my spell-check into a fit, put in a strong showing despite having started out a little faster than might have been wise. More on Da-Mean-Tree later. Robert Harris was definitely no stranger to the ultra circuit. Driving back and forth to the run, he would log the most time in transit, even more than he spent on the actual course. Finally, it's important to dispel the flurry of rumors about Bigfoot sightings. Singing loudly in order to practice his place-holder strategy, we could hear snippets of an Oingo-Boingo song, " I like little girls...." coming from Lambert Timmermans. Looking eerily like Tim Curry in his role for the Muppet Treasure Island, he was having a rougher than average day; pre-existing injury. A word to Lambert, if you get tired of singing, I hear that farting has been used with some degree of success. It was also during this downhill meet and greet that I crossed paths with Leigh Corbin and she demanded of me my Pokémon card. I made a show of being pissy at losing my chances at a new iPod, but in truthfulness wasn't really bothered at all. Having reached the bottom of the out-and-back segment, we headed across a clearing, crossed a creek, and headed down San M__eo / Te_a_a Fa_ls Trail. A short trail, it led to a double-wide creek bed which we then crossed to pick up the entrance to the T_n_ja F_lls Trail. Upwardly mobile for the better part of 2 miles, our group of three came to a T in the trail. We had encountered tough guy Leon Gray, of Badwater pacing fame, maybe 1 1/2 miles prior. Two hundred yards to the right was Aid Station #2 at 19.3 miles. No doubt a bundle of nerves from a harrowing ordeal involving confinement in a locked remote bathroom, Mari Russell would have us believe that she was actually grazing the potato chips. A little hard to believe once you've seen her abs. Not buying a single word of it, I plowed through the sandwiches which had been prepared by Mark Golledge, who also doubled as race-day photographer. Finishing the sandwiches and getting ready to start on the nearest ground squirrel, it was then that Jerry Armstrong, who had made the trip despite not feeling 100%, made a strong showing but opted out earlier to work security in case any Team Fierce fans starting getting out of line . Not seeing him since first meeting him at the Noble Canyon 50K in September, it was nice to catch up with Jerry for a bit. Along for the ride with the unknown RD, both were there to help navigate the next water crossing. Interested in his opinion, I asked Jerry what he thought of the course's degree of difficulty. Not thinking it particularly rough (6,600 feet of gain), it was then that Jerry spoke the words of trail wisdom that would stay with me the rest of the day: "It's a matter of perspective." Leaving the aid station with these two, there was no way on earth that I was going to be ferried across a water crossing like some helpless damsel. I'd never be able to call myself a trail runner knowing that I had traveled even a short distance by means other than my own locomotion. One by one, Eric, Robert and I negotiated an obscure but much drier path around the water. It was sometime later that  Dmitri would come to this same crossing and carve his niche in the history of this event. Perhaps hoping to make millions in a market already glutted with sports equipment, Mr. Chechuy produced two drawstring trash bags, placed them over his little footsies, and went for it.   Hmm, maybe he had an aversion to the extra 13 or 14 inches that the dry path would have added to the course distance. He was heard to remark on how surprisingly warm and foamy the water was, but he obviously hadn't seen Keira running away snickering. Dignity intact and about 3/4 of a mile along in our trip to our final aid station, we were treated to a view of the Te_aja F_lls. At last, after spending the better part of the morning on trails that mentioned the damned thing, we finally got to see it. It was dry. As he had throughout the day, Eric would periodically get a handle on the trail rage stirring within him by pulling ahead for awhile. Apparently moving at a pace dictated by my forward momentum can wear on a guy's nerves.  After about 4 miles, the landmark Dinosaur sign was a welcome relief, letting us know that the M_rg_n Trail was naught but 2 miles away. On this brief section, we came upon a Wally George understudy, in the person of Chris Diaz. He had started the day off somewhere between the first and second run groups, followed his own course (minus out-and-backs), and virtually assured himself of first pickings at the post-race food frenzy. Hey, Chris, I don't care if you did share your jelly beans; I don't mess around when it comes time to feed. Reaching a dead end into the Morga_ Trail, we parted ways with Chris and made our way along the 2.3-mile out-and-back that would lead us to Aid Station #3 at 27.7 miles.   Along the way, we would cross paths with Rob (Robo) Cowan and his wonderdog, Brandi. If there was even a remote chance of a runner going astray, these two would help them find the right path. Now, because this ended up being just a little bit longer a stretch, the distance had stoked the fire of my hunger. When the three of us finally emerged at the Mo_gan Trail head, we were told that some bikers from Hell's Kitchen would be the volunteers. Now, I'm no expert, but that place is way too pretty to be a real biker bar, and I doubt any of the patrons would want to get any appreciable amount of dust on their babies. Ditto the ragtop 6 Series BMW seen in the place's parking lot on the way home. Thankfully, however, it was our first two trail angels from Aid Station #1 that were to take care of us. To the horror of all those present, Mark's peanut butter and spun honey sandwiches looked less like sustenance than they did gazelles being taken down by some ponytailed lion. After the unknown RD informed us of Martin Brooks' intentions of catching up to us for the Pokémon card, none other than Martin himself emerged from the trail. So, being the pictures of composure, maturity and sportsmanship that we were, Eric and myself ducked behind a nearby BMW station wagon until he passed. Then, like a couple of giddy boys, we sprang out and ran back down the path that we had just run up. It didn't matter that I didn't still have that Pokémon card. My enthusiasm was due in equal parts to mischievously misleading Martin and jubilation at being close to finishing. Less than 10 minutes out of the aid station, we again encountered the mix of first and second group runners. It was totally impossible not to feel the collective energy from so many rugged spirits and feed from it. Faces seen earlier in the day were every bit the pleasure to be seen hours later. The time and distance hadn't softened our fellowship. They had made it more firm. Robert Baird, as had been his good-natured way all day, chided some of our fellow runners by greatly exaggerating the distance to the aid station. In the space of a couple of miles, Eric had finally had enough and moved forward, not to be seen until the conclusion of the run. Leaving Robert and myself on the M_g_n Trail, it wasn't too long before we were caught by the day's overall winner. No doubt sensing that we were distracted with the prospect of finishing, and certainly wanting a little payback for the parking lot stunt, Martin startled us as we ran along. After being scared out of my wits, and narrowly avoiding a laundry emergency of catastrophic proportions, I must have called Martin everything but his name/ Nimbly avoiding the F-bombs that I threw down, he took it all in stride, knowing that there was no real malice intended. Followed soon by Willie Cooper, the end of the run drew even closer. Almost home when we once again hit the Be_r Ca_yon trail, there was no way we were going to allow ourselves to be caught by anyone else. Picking up our pace, we finished the course up with a little something extra. Always glad to see the unknown RD, this was an instance where it was that much more pleasing. For our reward, the runners were treated to post-run food so incredibly good that it was hard to believe; Broiled Salmon, Japanese noodles, couscous, hot turkey chili... Prepared and served by the unknown RD’s wife, Lisa, and her mom, Laura Inouyue. Everything was of gourmet quality. They fed us all like royalty and treated us all as the best of friends. How amazing it was to think that these ladies were so generous of spirit that they would give freely of their time and energy to be of assistance. Not just of their own personal pursuits put aside, theirs was a sacrifice of time spent quietly alone with family. Even Lisa's adorable children (though locked in the car) lent their presence to the cause of our collective recovery, their boundless energy making it near impossible to feel anything but alive. Thus shrouded in layers of human warmth against the approaching chill, the whole lot of us sat huddled in a parking lot, eating and chatting, drinking thirstily the wine of good company. Not having seen the lady since our first out-and back-stretch, I finally saw Jennifer (Jenn100) Forman as we sat and broke bread. A tough-as-nails ultra runner, she's always a welcome sight. During this period of respite and regrouping, hugs flowed freely and many pictures were snapped.   And, in between mouthfuls of food, it was then that I heard a gentle voice call me by name. Somebody, it seemed, had a gift for me. Leigh Corbin, wonderful lady that she is, handed me the very Pokémon card that had been traded to her. It was the iPod card!   I had nothing to give in return, except for a big bear hug, which I did as I thanked her profusely. Thank you, Leigh!! I guess I better by a computer to load the darn thing. Now, basking in post-race reminiscence, I'm certain that this was a special day. Sure, it was a topflight event, unmatched in its sense of organization. The combination of three out-and-backs with the staggered start guaranteed you would mingle with other runners a minimum of three times during the 31.8 miles. We normally see elite runners like Dean Dobberteen and Michelle Barton during the first 100 yards of an ultra and then later as they drive off with the trophies as we’re just crossing the finish line. The unknown ?k was everything that I wished for my first ultra, and every one thereafter, could be. But there was not one thing that could be removed from the day's events and leave in its place a whole and complete experience. For the opportunity, we left all the richer. And, it's an opportunity that I will hunger for and be hopeful of when it is next staged. How does one get into the unknown ?k 2009? It’s unknown but one thing is for certain. Be an ambassador of trail running and not just a participant, the entry form will find you. And, for the record, the unknown ?k gives 100% entry fee refunds upon request; long story. Cheers, Captain Kirk

Official Results

Start Time / Place / Runner / Clock Time (P.M) / Hours

7:40 a.m. 1 Martin Brooks 1:52 6:12:00
7:40 a.m. 2 Willie Cooper 1:59 6:19:00
7:40 a.m. 3 Robert Schipsi 2:09 6:29:00
7:40 a.m. 4 Greg Hardesty 2:11 6:31:00
7:40 a.m. 5 Dean Dobberteen 2:15 6:35:00
7:40 a.m. 6 Michelle Barton 2:15 6:35:00
7:40 a.m. 7 Keira Henninger 2:15 6:35:00
7:40 a.m. 8 Gina Natera 2:15 6:35:00
7:40 a.m. 9 Kevin Nasman 2:29 6:49:00
7:40 a.m. 10 Michael Crescenti 2:33 6:53:00
7:40 a.m. 11 Dmitri Chechuy 2:45 7:05:00
7:40 a.m. 12 Robert Harris NA 7:32:00
7:40 a.m. 13 Lambert Timmermans NA 7:38:00
6:05 a.m. 14 Eric Klingsporn 1:54 7:49:00
6:05 a.m. 15 Kirk Fortini 2:01 7:56:00
6:05 a.m. 16 Robert Baird 2:02 7:57:00
6:05 a.m. 17 Lisa Kuecker 2:36 8:31:00
6:05 a.m. 18 Michelle MecHam 2:49 8:44:00
6:05 a.m. 19 Pete Vara 2:57 8:52:00
6:05 a.m. 20 Andy Kumeda 3:27 9:22:00
6:05 a.m. 21 Catra Corbit 3:27 9:22:00
6:05 a.m. 22 George Velasco 4:05 10:00:00
6:05 a.m.   Leigh Corbin   IRAD
7:40 a.m.   Jerry Armstrong   IRAD
7:40 a.m.   Jennifer Foreman   IRAD
NA            Chris Diaz   IRAD
   
IRAD   Intentionally Ran Alternate Distance

The Run Down

Charlie Nickell & Greg Hardesty (cute couple?)

HOME

Ok, We’ve Been Flakes!

It's been hectic trying to keep track of all the ultra events. We owe our readers a ton of back information and we’re on it. In the next two weeks we’ll post the following stories.

--07 Old Goats 50 Mile Re-Cap & 4/12/08 preview.

--08 Winter Trail Run Series Re-Cap: 12k thru 21k.

--Coyote Two Moons participant feedback.

--March's stealth "the unknown ?k" Re-Cap.

Team Fierce Michelle Barton & Keira Henninger. Aren't they terrifying?

3/15/08 "the unknown ?k" Results!

1. Martin Brooks 6:12:00
2. Willie Cooper 6:19:00
3. Robert Schipsi 6:29:00

4. Greg Hardesty 6:31:00
5. Dean Dobberteen 6:35:00
6. Michelle Barton 6:35:00
7. Keira Henninger 6:35:00
8. Gina Natera 6:35:00
9. Kevin Nasman 6:49:00
10. Michael Crescenti 6:53:00
11. Dmitri Chechuy 7:05:00
12. Robert Harris 7:32:00
13. Lambert Timmermans 7:38:00
14. Eric Klingsporn 7:49:00
15. Kirk Fortini 7:56:00
16. Robert Baird 7:57:00
17. Lisa Kuecker 8:31:00
18. Michelle MecHam 8:44:00
19. Pete Vara 8:52:00
20. Andy Kumeda 9:22:00
21. Catra Corbit 9:22:00
22. George Velasco 10:00:00

Chris Diaz   IRAD*
Leigh Corbin   IRAD
Jerry Armstrong   IRAD
Jennifer Foreman   IRAD

*Intentionally Ran Alternate Distance

Is this the best mile 20 water crossing you've ever seen? The one and only Dmitri Chechuy in the 2008 "the unknown ?k"

HOME

So, why do you run?

I have teenagers! Now, don't jump to conclusions! I'm not saying that having teenagers is a bad thing or that I run away from them every chance I get. On the contrary; Running is now a family event that brings us closer together. Let me explain:

I recently asked both my teenage daughters (16 and 17 years old) to crew for me at the Rio Del Lago 100 mile endurance run. I wanted them to get an idea of how exciting running 100 miles can be. I wanted them to get the sense of adventure and respect for the athletes. I thought it would be so beneficial for them to see why their mom (me!) loves the sport so much.

My 16 year old (Valley Girl?) diva daughter was jumping up and down at mile 70 during the race. I could see her in the distance, shouting her excitement. I thought, "Wow, she is so proud of me!" When I arrived at the site, she ran up and embraced me and said, " Oh My Gawd Mom, the guys out here are completely hot!" Let me back up...this is a girl I had to drag out of bed to attend. She understands cosmetics but sports mean nothing to her....this was a big moment.

Mile 80 or so, my older daughter pulls me aside at the aid station. I think she wants to tell me how I have inspired her and how I am a queen among women in her world. She says, " Mom, who is that guy over there with the amazing calf muscles??" Next aid station, mile 90 or so. I run into the aid station and my crew has grown. It now includes two six foot tall teenage boys, approximately 17 and 18. "Mom!" they both simultaneously exclaimed, "This is the best event ever! We will crew for you anytime!!".

I have now completely bonded with my teenagers and running is now a family event. Now they understand the thrill and adventure and my love of the sport and want to go to every event....oh and yeah, sometimes they even remember to fill mom's water bottle.

Molly Sheridan

Please email The Run Down at therundown@cox.net on why you run. We'll publish our top three favorites to coincide with March's monthly newsletter. Everyone who submits a reasonable effort will be mailed RECOVER-ease samples.